I need unbiased advice please.

C
R
E
A
T
E

A
D

Subeta Forums > Chit-Chat > Issues & Advice

#1 :: October 30th, 2011 @ 10:14 PM

Silly Spamming Sausage

423 Posts
184 Achievements

I am in a serious relationship right now. My boyfriend is going into the Air Force. I am about to go to college. I live in Florida and I have Florida prepaid college. I need two years of community college before I can go to a university for the prepaid to be effective. The university I want to go to is in Alabama. If I go to a state college in Alabama then I'll have guaranteed acceptance to an Alabama college. The problem is, I don't want to be away from my boyfriend for the couple of years I'll be in Alabama. There are no Air Force bases near the colleges I'm looking at and there is a good chance he'll be deployed out of state any way. What should I do? Go to the college I want to go to or go with him and go to the colleges that are available near the places where he's deployed?

#2 :: October 31st, 2011 @ 1:50 AM

is a Mirage

3,348 Posts
481 Achievements

@Karnet
That's a tricky one. I've been with my boyfriend for about 2 1/2 years and we've discussed this similar issue since he's majoring in music and I'm majoring in either english or environmental studies, requiring us to attend different institutions. But my gut advice says that you should go with the college(s) in Alabama. I guess you never know what will happen with your boyfriend as far as where he'll be deployed to, but the likelihood of him being sent out of state seems likely from my experience.

But, it all comes down to how you feel about it. If you want to try to make it work for the both of you, whether it be a long distance relationship or trying to stay near your boyfriend. For some people the worst part of leaving high school is ending relationships with people you care so much about.

I hope all ends satisfactory for you. *hugs*

--Tumblr--
--DeviantArt--
--Chictopia--

#3 :: October 31st, 2011 @ 1:52 AM

Gets Around

4,386 Posts
468 Achievements

@

He's going to be exceptionally busy, and so are you. You will both be stressed and the time you have together may not always be as lovely and peachy as you hope it to be. Go to the college that will benefit you. If your relationship will work out, it will work out. Don't risk the education you want just to be around him when you're both probably going to end up not seeing much of each other anyways.

#4 :: October 31st, 2011 @ 1:56 AM

is a Sun-Worshipper

3,767 Posts
772 Achievements

art by Jordan

@
Slightly biased advice: I almost followed an ex-boyfriend to another city for university when he informed me a long-distance relationship would never work. In the end, I stayed put and he left, and we broke up. I don't miss him

#5 :: October 31st, 2011 @ 8:06 AM

is a Mirage

175 Posts
444 Achievements

@

Slightly unbiased here as well. One of my exes was Army. We tried the long distance thing and it didn't work for us. I'm emotionally high maintenance and no amount of self flagellation is going to fix that. The man I'm with now is also emotionally high maintenance and it's working out well. We've discussed the possibilities of us being separated and we think we'd be able to handle it for a short period of time. Really, it all comes down to what you want most, and what you're comfortable with. Knowing military, he'll be busy as all get out. You will be too, which will help a bit. A friend of mine an his girlfriend got married one he got into the Air Force. It worked out well. Every situation is different. My personal advice is to go to school in Alabama. Debt is, to be frank, a dog. If you have a guaranteed scholarship go for it. Absence makes the heart grow fonder and all that rot after all.

#6 :: November 1st, 2011 @ 12:01 PM

Member

36 Posts
2 Achievements

Unbiased advice:
Break up with him.

But really.

You both need to make the most of the opportunities given to you. If you guys are truly in love or whatever, you'll be able to handle the distance. But, odds are, as most high school relationships tend to do, you guys will end up breaking up. You'll both (especially you) meet so many new people. Get the best college education you can. Boys can leave you, but you get to keep that diploma forever.

#7 :: November 1st, 2011 @ 4:03 PM

is a SUPER USER!!!

109 Posts
158 Achievements

I think that you need to do what's best for you, and only you in this situation. Long distance can and does work and if it doesn't in your case, it wasn't meant to be. You'll both be extremely busy and I'm sure that any time you do get together after being apart will be special enough for you to see things through. Focus on your education first most, men come and go and if your relationship is strong enough, this one will stay.

You both need to do what's right for the individual. I wish you the best of luck with everything!

#8 :: November 1st, 2011 @ 4:24 PM

is a Morostide Warrior

10,940 Posts
1,218 Achievements

@
I'm with everyone else here. Go where you want to go. Long distance relationships can work, and there's that chance he'll be deployed anyway. And you want to make sure your future is set.

And this is unrelated kinda, but can I ask which school you're looking at? I go to UA and am just curious. :p

#9 :: November 1st, 2011 @ 7:23 PM

Silly Spamming Sausage

423 Posts
184 Achievements

Thanks for all the advice

I think it's too early to say what I'm going to do about it. I honestly don't know. By the way, I wanna go to Auburn University

#10 :: November 3rd, 2011 @ 5:13 PM

First Mate

6,626 Posts
591 Achievements

@Karnet;; do what's best for you. if the relationship was meant to last then it will.
nothing worse than moving out with someone and then breaking up with them only to find yourself in a place you forced yourself to be in in the end.
that happened to a friend of mine in high school. 8k a year for a girl he broke up with at the end of their freshman year.

and i may see you at auburn if you go there (and stay) after the end of next year. d:
i'm considering them, as well, for their vet program.

#11 :: November 5th, 2011 @ 10:48 PM

Has a Massive Family

3,214 Posts
478 Achievements

Previously the user Wailord

@
I would go with school. Slightly unbiased here as well, haha, since the guy I want to be with is in the Canadian Forces. He lives in Ontario, and I'm in Montreal. I've asked him out, and he says he wants to wait until we're both settled (he's just been promoted, so it's a little hectic atm), if we're both still single by then. He's definitely the logical type too, so I trust his judgment, and am passing it on to you.
I'm a little lucky, since the university I want to go to is in the same city he's in, but other than that, I probably won't see very much of him. The army is a full time job, and it's both stressful and unpredictable. I met him about two years ago, so he was 21 at the time. He had just come to Montreal to visit family and had just come back from Afghanistan. I can guarantee you that your boyfriend is going to be deployed at some point or other, and you're going to have to deal with him being overseas. Try long distance for a while and make sure that you can deal with it before going through with anything. There's a possibility that he's going to be gone for a long time.

Ten things you can do to save our oceans. ♥