What does it feel like to fall in love/ have a crush? II

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Subeta Forums > Chit-Chat > Relationships

#1 :: May 16th, 2012 @ 11:27 AM

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I really wanted to answer this question for @, and figured that a new thread was fitting.

I've fallen in like.
I've fallen in lust.
I've had romance.
I've had fate/chance.
I've loved.
I've had faith.
I've been loyal.
I've been loved.
I've been in love.

The trick, and please understand that the briefness of the word "trick" understates the complexity of this, is to do them all at the same time. I have come very close many times and compromised one or more to make a relationship work, because it just felt so right on those other levels, but in the end I was fooling myself because the key is that you need it all. Every one of those, and a dozen others my soul can't muster words for, and then you will know. If I had to liken it to something, it would be like Harry taking hold of his wand for the first time (/NERD).

I've married and divorced because I compromised just a couple of those, some unknowingly, but that's life.

Now... Oh, now I'm a blubbering fool that has it all, above and then some, with @. I waited. I took the time to heal, which meant feeling lonely a lot. But ultimately I knew that if I held steadfast to being myself, above and beyond anything else, that I'd find the one that would be all of those things. Every time we communicated, saw each other, or went on small adventures prior to our first date, I knew. I knew it in the core of my soul, and I knew because I wanted to share all of everything from before with her. Walls went away that had always been there, and I do mean always (see above).

It's like skydiving naked through raspberry jello in a universe where yeast infections don't exist*.

It happened for me, so, there's my two cents.

How about the rest of you?

*SUGAR DOESN'T EVER BELONG DOWN THERE, BOYS AND GIRLS ALIKE, EVER, EVER, EVER.

#2 :: May 16th, 2012 @ 5:45 PM

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Why are you so charming? I still don't know what either of us did to deserve this, but it rocks more than raspberry jello.

I still don't even know how to put it into words. You got pretty damn close, but there's always going to be this aspect you really can't narrow down. You're going to smile like an idiot and not know why. A lot. It doesn't feel like anything anyone else will tell you it feels like. It'll feel like bits and pieces from a thousand songs, books, movies, anecdotes. Nothing will feel like it really captures what you're trying to get out. I still don't even know how to explain it. When you can't explain it, that's love.

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#3 :: May 16th, 2012 @ 6:31 PM

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You two are just too cute. Like 'kittens wearing kittens hats covered in warm Nutella' cute.

I would like to add that, for me, having bad times and still find the way to smile just because the other person is in there with you, gives you the strenght of a thousand Hulks.
Chasing a dream with someone, no matter what or how bad it can gets, it's part of having that special relationship that everyone is searching for.

After a lot of pain in my life, I found the person who makes me feel complete. The one who will never let me down, the one who smiles for me when everything looks bad, and the one who fought for me like anyone did before.
We had a very big crisis a year ago, and we were very confused at that time. But we felt that love could heal all the scars, we bet for our future and now we know that we made the right choice. :3

We know that, may be, the future will bring hard times, but we are ready. We are ready for everything.

I never felt this kind of courage before, I never felt all this love before, and all this faith in someone.

I guess that's just a little part of what it feels to be in love. =n__n=

#4 :: May 16th, 2012 @ 7:05 PM

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I agree that like said, you really do need it all. Imo you need that warm fuzzy feeling of best-friendship, that lusty/primal feel of physical attraction, solid trust, and you need to love them/have them completely love you back. There are little things that also help make a relationship work too that I've realized are important down the road; things like patience (my boyfriend has infinite amounts of patience, I'm not always the easiest to deal with), motivation, good communication (without keeping ANY secrets), and showing appreciation for each other, even in little ways.

Sacrificing even on of those things is pretty much a key to failure (at least in my dating experience). I've dated a guy I was physically SO attracted to (seriously, he was smokin omfg) but he didn't love me back, and I couldn't trust him. It was purely physical and although I was happy, it was really just a big lie and I was kidding myself. And our relationship failed miserably. I've dated a guy where we had trust, companionship, and were close but physically we had no chemistry and I had no desires to kiss/touch him romantically.

I'm not sure what is exactly a "debate" about this since imo there's no universal "definition of love" so to speak. I personally agree with 's criteria for the most part, but everyone is different so I see no right/wrong (: glad to hear you two seem so happy though! Complete love is something so true and rare. My boyfriend and I always tell each other "some people go through their entire lives never having what we have, so never take it for granted".

#5 :: May 17th, 2012 @ 1:12 AM

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Also, if you can find a guy that's willing to play Subeta, he's a keeper.

#6 :: May 17th, 2012 @ 1:22 AM

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Yeah, you've officially ruined me for all other men. I HOPE YOU'RE (as) HAPPY (as I am <3).

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#7 :: May 17th, 2012 @ 2:46 AM

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@ kinda hit the point. It's not a "debate," and there won't be a question when it happens. It'll just... be love.

#8 :: May 17th, 2012 @ 8:34 AM

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LOL, @Zerid my boyfriend is also playing Subeta.
That means he's a keeper?

Hey, @Capitan, did you hear that? You're a keeper, bb bear!!!! =___=

Last Edit by: Bastit 5/17/12 - 8:35:11 am

#9 :: May 17th, 2012 @ 8:47 AM

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We should totally start a cult for BF's.

@ @

#10 :: May 17th, 2012 @ 9:15 AM

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@Zerid

I love the idea!

#11 :: May 17th, 2012 @ 10:05 PM

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It was just in the debate forum so I thought I'd ask! But yeah, I basically agree with your entire first post lol.

#12 :: May 17th, 2012 @ 10:54 PM

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My past problems were that I was selfish and immature, and a teenager lol. I guess you could say that love is when you stop thinking about what you want, and worry more about the other person. I think it's like that with any relationship (Parent, friend, etc.) You two are adorable. I hope I can help you with this perspective. I'm no expert, just observant.

#13 :: May 19th, 2012 @ 2:57 AM

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I believe that love is very rare, perhaps even doesn't exist.
Sexual attraction is around, but love?

Perhaps it's because I've never experienced it before. All I've ever felt is an uncomfortable feeling of deep regret when I meet and am around someone I feel really sexually attracted to and enjoy their personality. And felt that same way whenever a person has told me that they loved me.

I agree with: like, lust, loyalty, fate/chance, faith and even romance to be in a relationship with someone though. But those things don't seem to be a check list for you to use to see if you're in love or not. Those are just things that you look for in a person you want to be a friend, close or not.

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#14 :: May 19th, 2012 @ 4:53 AM

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My sister said love has an 'it factor' that you can't explain, like you can't be without the other person or something.. she has found it with her new man (second relationship) where her first relationship did not have the 'it factor'. My parents seem to have the 'it factor' aswell, they love to spend time together just doing nothing or going out.
I've never been in love and have never really wanted a relationship.

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#15 :: May 19th, 2012 @ 7:41 AM

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I guess I would agree with every part except for lust. I don't personally think falling in love requires lusting after the person too.
Of course, it's different for everyone. However, that's exactly why I don't think it's possible to list things that you need to feel before you're truly in love with someone.

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#16 :: May 25th, 2012 @ 3:54 PM

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It feels like anything else that triggers pleasure receptors in your brain, good enough that you want it to never stop, and when it does, you want to find it again. It will always be fleeting, though. This is why real and lasting relationships are based on unconditional love and not infatuation.

#17 :: July 13th, 2012 @ 9:45 PM

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It's beautiful, true, pure and should feel like breathing-nothing more or less.

If you have to force it, its not going to work. Sigh....love

Makes me happy thinking about the person I love. Love makes you a better person, and makes you free. You find a side of you that was better than before, and you want it to stay. This person is your Soul's Muse and you want to just spread some kind of inner light.

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#18 :: July 14th, 2012 @ 8:41 AM

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I'm actually going to move this to the relationships sub-forum in chit-chat as I'm not sure this is necessarily a debate. It seems at the moment it's more of a share your experiences regarding love topic which would be more suitable for that particular forum.

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