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C R E A T E A D |
Pathological Liars
| #1 :: June 3rd, 2012 @ 9:49 AM | |
 ashlehPosting Machine   79 Posts 41 Achievements  
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 If you've know anyone with it, how do you deal with it?
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| #2 :: June 7th, 2012 @ 1:45 PM | |
| Kittens Posting Machine  92 Posts 174 Achievements |
And now the rain it comes The rain it blurs the gray line  But yeah, my sister is a pathological liar, and its very very frustrating. She just has to lie about everything, and I'm not talking out of sisterly hate or anything, I love my sister. Talking with her about anything, she would just make things up, doesn't matter how big or small, and even if you catch her in the lie she would persist as if it really was the truth. It would get really really annoying at times, but since I've moved away from home I don't have to deal with it anymore so eh But I think people like that should be treated. It could potentially ruin their lives so.
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| #3 :: June 18th, 2012 @ 12:12 AM | |
| Dandelina Le Extreme Spammer   3,077 Posts 252 Achievements |
@ashleh I think part of why not much is known is because that would involve patients bringing in their families to therapy and then corroborating stories, and then we have to take a leap of faith to trust the parents who would create this pathological liar (I'm assuming it's a learned thing, but maybe it's genetic, either way I don't think it's purely a physiological phenomenon). I personally feel like it's just a symptom of a larger problem, though it may be present in multiple disorders, I can't rule that out.
I've only seen it in two people, both are young Hispanic females in their 20s who are sexually promiscuous. One used to be a very good friend of mine (we were part of a trio of friends, myself and the other friend always knew she was a huge liar but we figured as long as we know that, it won't hurt us, and she'll never change so whatever). The other is a coworker, who I don't know well, but given by the way she acts at work...she's a huge piece of work. She always lies about her job performance, other people's job performance, and it is typically about extremely petty things. There will be literally one item left in a basket that she needs to put back on the floor, but she will pretend that it was there before she got there and thus it's not her responsibility, but she is cognizant that I know she's lying since I know the item has been in the basket for hours. It is so bizarre. My theory is that it manifests itself in spoiled people. My ex friend was the baby of the family and would constantly act out but never get disciplined. And this coworker just had a baby, still lives with her mom, and didn't know who the father of the baby was until they did a DNA test. She whines to her mom, she whines to coworkers, she whines to customers. I think it would probably not need medicine to treat, it sounds more like a cognitive therapy thing. At least for the lying part.
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| #4 :: June 18th, 2012 @ 2:38 AM | |
| ashleh Posting Machine 79 Posts 41 Achievements |
xD Yes, derp, they are real. Silly me, I misspoke. My question was more if you think its a legitimate disorder? Are those diagnosed with it actually incapable of telling the truth? Or do they just choose not to? Could they stop? @Dandelina That's a pretty good theory. I believe that its mostly children who were never disciplined, not necessarily spoiled. Most people lie as children and we have to be told otherwise not to do it. Maybe telling the truth is a learned trait? And kids who lacked direction or didn't have a real role model just never learned the importance of the truth. I'm kind of hoping someone who has it might be able to talk about it.
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| #5 :: June 18th, 2012 @ 2:39 PM | |
| Dandelina Le Extreme Spammer 3,077 Posts 252 Achievements |
@ashleh I find that personal testimonies usually amount to nothing because most people have no insight and are also wont to subconsciously twist the truth.
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| #6 :: June 18th, 2012 @ 4:02 PM | |
| ashleh Posting Machine 79 Posts 41 Achievements |
That's very true. I just often wonder if its a legitimate disorder. Everyone lies every once in a while. Some people do it more often then others. Is it just a phase that some people don't grow out of? Is it a sign of immaturity? Or is it really a psychological problem? For the sake of avoiding rude people, I wish to clarify that I prefer coming onto forums like this and asking these things rather than searching on the internet, because internet searches have a common tendency to be incorrect or just give terrible definitions. I also which to get opinions about it, and advice on how to deal with it.
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| #7 :: June 18th, 2012 @ 4:08 PM | |
| Dandelina Le Extreme Spammer 3,077 Posts 252 Achievements |
@ashleh Well, I think the defining criteria should be like with addictions, in that the lies start to create consequences, and that is when it can start to be a disorder.
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| #8 :: June 18th, 2012 @ 6:31 PM | |
| Nightingale Gets Around  4,379 Posts 468 Achievements |
@ashleh I don't think lying at any point is really a sign of immaturity. Most everyone lies at some point and while it can be about exceptionally immature things a lot of it isn't and a lot of lies occur for very different reasons from white lies to protect a person's feelings to lies to protect themselves. I think there is a considerable difference between a person who lies regularly, and a person who has a compulsion to lie. For a person who is a pathological liar it's not goal oriented, it's not out of getting their way, being spoiled, etc. it's just what occurs. It's their natural responses to everything big or small. The truth for them is something that feels wrong inside and the lie is correct. I personally don't know if I've ever met a person who is a pathological liar. I've met plenty of people who lie a lot needlessly but I wouldn't call them pathological because they can and do tell the truth, and they pick and choose when to lie. A person who is a pathological liar isn't picking and choosing. In that way, you can't just tell a pathological liar to 'tell the truth'. It's far deeper than that and it needs to be worked through. I think many kids go through lying phases often as a way to test their parents. I've met a few parents who were often exacerbated and infuriated by their child, young and old, because they lied and were brought up under the belief that honesty is the policy. Alternatively I've been friends with some really exceptional people who were very honest but had really distinctly poor home lives and parents. Nature versus nurture has always been a tricky argument and something that can't be decided one way or the other, as you often find anomalies in both theory. It is surprising what comes through genetically though so I wouldn't doubt it could be a possibility that way, and I also wouldn't doubt it could be learned somehow at some point. You can trigger all sorts of things, why not pathological lying? Then again I haven't read too deeply into the subject.
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| #9 :: June 18th, 2012 @ 7:32 PM | |
| FallingInReverse is a Sun-Worshipper  319 Posts 151 Achievements |
I definitly believe in the disease. My sister suffers from it. shes accused my fiance and my little brothers best friend of attack. She cant help it. her theattacker says that the best way to describe what she does is that when asked a question lying is just so natural to her that she doesn't know what else to do. You can ask her anything and ninety percent of the time she will lie. It doesnt even have to be anything of monumental matter. So i do believe in them, however i have no idea how to deal with it. We just found out she was a pathological liar. I love my sister but i have no idea how to forgive her or even talk to her. so right now we'll just see how it goes @ashleh
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| #10 :: June 25th, 2012 @ 1:50 PM | |
| Kittens Posting Machine 92 Posts 174 Achievements |
And now the rain it comes The rain it blurs the gray line Well I don't think its a real disorder, just a really really bad habit. I don't think they're incapable of telling the truth but are just too used to make things up that they just see it as default.
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| #11 :: June 25th, 2012 @ 5:22 PM | |
| Nidoqueen is Darksided!  219 Posts 351 Achievements |
In some cases, I could see it being a legitimate disorder. Maybe this person dreams stuff, and truly believes that it happened to them and don't really know they're lying. This happened to my brother a lot after he had a severe concussion. It is hard to deal with, because some of the things he says make it seem like they really did happen.
In other cases, I think people use it as an attention-seeking method. There were always a few girls around school who would tell lies to one group to make herself seem cool, and then go to another group and make up more lies, or deny that she told the first group anything. It was always for attention, just trying to create drama.
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| #12 :: July 13th, 2012 @ 3:26 AM | |
| bri is a Mirage  450 Posts 369 Achievements |
 This topic is very fragile for me.I had to cut out two of my relatives because they are pathological liars. One of them seems to be affected to a lesser degree, but the other seems to be entirely delusional in combination with the disease. If at any point it reaches such a breaking point that they defend their lies with brute violence, I say they belong in an asylum. I'm saying this about my own mother. I think the disease comes in difference stages. It could be very mild to very severe. My grandmother could control her lying to some degree, and her pathological lying did not always define her. It was still incredibly frequent though, but it wasn't usually very malicious if malicious at all. She did lie A LOT though, don't get me wrong. The degree was usually just a lot more harmless, though favorable for her. I do also believe she was able to realize when she was lying most of the time. Looking at my mother and comparing her to my grandmother is why I believe there are stages. If you simply sat in a room with them together, you would see the similarity in their behavior and compulsion with lying. Nonetheless, it is far more brutal of a problem with my mother. I truly believe she has little true grasp on reality and believes her lies, right as she is inventing them. Sometimes I believe she can tell, but that margin seems to be fairly slim. It might be that she simply begins to believe them, no matter how fanatical the web she's weaved is. If she lied and said the sky was purple, she could eventually believe it for example. She walks within a realm of fantasy, but is still able to come back to reality. The woman is clearly mentally ill, but not so much that she is totally insane. I have a really hard time describing her connection and disconnection from reality. It's sometimes hard to gauge when she believes her lies and when she does not. One example of when she does know, has to be the instance of her husband (poor sap - he's also a bit questionable though). She alerted me of her deceit and used this deceit to entangle a man substantially more wealthy than she. The lies rained down like a hell-storm. She knew about them, and she was using them to win his affection. One thing I suspect she began to believe was the story of her assaulting me, however (for the record, I don't need pity as I'm entirely over the encounter). She assaulted me and regrettably I wound up bruising her. I pushed her off of me, so she couldn't continue. I fled. She fled to her friend's house. Apparently, she began telling the story of how I overcame her and began to bludgeon her. This obviously wasn't the case, but hell, no one was willing to look at the marks upon my body. I was a mere child then anyway, so no one I told believed me. I do honestly believe somewhere down the road she began to believe I had assaulted her, not the other way around. In court documents she was very adamant that I assaulted her, even. The woman was willing to try to send her daughter to jail over a lie. Surely the woman had begun to believe it. Moving on. In cases such as my grandmothers, I was able to deal with it. I would be able to deal with it, had she not done one particular thing. If the illness is mild, I believe it can be tolerated by society and is not too grand of a problem. I think therapy is necessary, but I'm not a doctor. With cases such as my mother, I think intense - and forced - therapy is necessary. The severity of her condition has harmed individuals both emotionally and physically. I know a few people that had begun seeing their own theattackers because of the toll she caused. I was and am one of those people. When a case is so severe, I might even recommend being taken into a mental hospital for evaluation at the very least. Maybe I'm reading too much into it, my mother may very well have complications that very well surpass pathological lying. I suspect she has other crippling disorders. I am very apologetic if any of this sounds harsh. I also fully recognize I am not a doctor and I am not a genius on the subject. This is also based off my own opinion and I might have gotten a little emotional sounding while writing this. On a final note, I don't know whether to believe it's hereditary or learned. It seems like a combination of both. If personality can be somewhat genetic, then I think certain factors of instability and emotional distress could amplify the illness. Maybe it's based entirely on environment. The situation with my grandmother and mother could probably stand testament to both theories. Like alcoholism, it could also be related to genetic addiction perhaps? No clue. @ashleh
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| #13 :: July 15th, 2012 @ 2:49 AM | |
| dot is a Mirage  70 Posts 97 Achievements |
@ashleh
Didn't they show that the brains of pathological liars are different to ours? I personally believe that it's a proper disorder. I have a Style File. |
| #14 :: August 4th, 2012 @ 12:48 AM | |
| Haywood is a Mirage  340 Posts 136 Achievements |
i've known a few. i have been friends with two serious cancer fakers. they would go to a hospital and take pictures in the lobby and stuff to show them "being admitted." they bought oxygen tanks and cannulas online to take photos and videos and one girl SHAVED HER HEAD to perpetuate the lies. that latter girl fooled not only thousands of people online, but her REAL LIFE BEST FRIEND. she faked seizures and soiled herself in her presence. all of us who were close to both these girls felt absolutely sick, betrayed, and uncomfortable about everyone else we knew when we found out. i know these don't exactly fit the definition, as they're both much, much more mentally ill than simple pathological liars. but these people really hurt others with their lies that kept coming and coming and being supported by real props and the like and it was all so disgusting. Last Edit by:
Haywood 8/04/12 - 12:48:47 am
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| #15 :: August 11th, 2012 @ 8:51 PM | |
| Aang Gets Around  1,956 Posts 387 Achievements |
@ashleh
My sister is one. Her name is actually Ashleigh, kinda like your UN. She likes to lie to gain sympathy, but she seriously has a problem. Yesterday my mom was reading her Facebook messages and she would say she cooked pancakes for breakfast when she didn't, and she even lied and said I wrecked my car to one of her friends. It's just, I don't even. I don't even see the need to lie about stupid crap like that. I know I sound very insensitive, but you have to understand that she has loveed my whole family over so many times I honestly hate her. She is the only person I can honestly say I hate and dispise with every fiber of my being. But anyways, yeah.
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| #16 :: August 11th, 2012 @ 9:21 PM | |
 myshyttais Darksided!  661 Posts 418 Achievements |
@ashleh Well, i had an ex... And i can sure tell you that they are real! He would lie so much to me that i would even believe it sometimes, Its incredible how much they believe there own crap. He would lie about where he was born, what language he spoke, all kinds of crap. He thought he was brazilian so bad that he even learned half of portugese <- not sure how you spell it. But i found out his ways after i met his mom, and his family. They are full native american,. He was such a good guy though, from what he did for me. But his lies were too much. he joined the marines and was in basic, he would tell me how he would be blowing up people and all kinds of crap. From what i know being around so much military all my life, you are not in afghanistan blowing up people if your only in basic. He got himself to believe it so bad.. So i just couldnt take the lies. They are real.
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| #17 :: August 17th, 2012 @ 10:19 AM | |
| TemporalApparition Member  15 Posts 41 Achievements |
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| #18 :: October 28th, 2012 @ 12:26 AM | |
| Diru Blabbermouth  615 Posts 107 Achievements |
A guy I dated several years ago had sex with multiple girls while we were together. From what I have heard, he's cheated on girls he dated after me and he has cheated on the one he's with right now. However, if you speak to him, he will act as if the girls are the ones cheating. He'll play the innocent victim and he will NEVER admit to cheating, even if you catch him. You could walk in on him having sex with another girl and he would deny it and he would tell everyone it was you he walked in on. I dunno if either of these people are true pathological liars or not, but I figured I'd share. edit- OH, I also became friends with this guy my senior year of high school. I believe he is a pathological liar, definitely. He lied about the dumbest, most insignificant things. Once he texted me, telling me to come over. So I went over and he wasn't home. I asked where he was and he told me he was getting ice cream. I sat in his living room and he continued acting as if he was getting ice cream. Nearly 3 hours later, he texts me telling me he's on his way back home. I told a mutual friend about this and she told me he was at a friend's house making a birthday cake for someone. We were just friends and it wasn't as if I forbade him to see his friends?! So I don't really know why he lied about making a birthday cake? That kid lied about so much, I couldn't handle speaking with him anymore. You could watch him eat a pizza, then ask him what he ate, and he'd tell you he ate french toast.  Last Edit by:
Diru 10/28/12 - 12:33:16 am
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| #19 :: November 29th, 2012 @ 2:53 AM | |
| Sakuraba Is a Survivor  2,615 Posts 103 Achievements |
Last Edit by:
Sakuraba 11/29/12 - 2:59:03 am
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| #20 :: November 29th, 2012 @ 4:46 PM | |
| Aang Gets Around 1,956 Posts 387 Achievements |
@Sakuraba (I love your UN)
She doesn't really talk to my family anymore. Honestly the reason I don't sympathize with her because she had a kid and then dumped him on my mom (he's actually crawling all over me right now). She doesn't really care what any of us think of her, but I wouldn't tell her I hated her to her face. Hope that makes sense, like I said I have a 5 year old basically laying on my head.
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| #21 :: December 2nd, 2012 @ 12:54 AM | |
| innocence Gets Around  1,545 Posts 404 Achievements |
 ]Yeah, I know someone like that, but I don't think it should be a real disease. I rarely believe what this girl says, like 50% of the time, since she lies so much about the simplest of things xD Tumblr Style File Deviantart
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| #22 :: December 2nd, 2012 @ 1:42 AM | |
| piano Gets Around  6,485 Posts 533 Achievements |
I know two people like that. One of them would say her mother had died, then post a facebook status about how her mother was a dog. She'd lie about every tiny thing. It really annoyed a lot of people.
The other girl had narcissistic personality disorder, she was really a mess. Of course it's real. Personally I just assume everything they say is bullcrap, it works for me.
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| #23 :: December 30th, 2012 @ 12:48 AM | |
| Troll The Royal  2,551 Posts 822 Achievements |
I personally feel like it's just a symptom of a larger problem, though it may be present in multiple disorders, I can't rule that out. I would say this to be a pretty accurate statement. My aunt is no doubt a pathological liar, I'd rather not go too far into detail but she's a classified shopaholic and alcoholic. I believe her lying is a direct result of her addictions, and I believe if she got them under control it would go away.
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| #24 :: February 24th @ 5:18 PM | |
| Kizzari Gets Around  103 Posts 334 Achievements |
I don't believe it's a legitimate disorder, though I also think that the majority of things that are diagnosed as "disorders" and fed drugs are not legitimate. I think it's more along the lines of an addiction. I believe these people can stop, but it's hard for them. Some of them lie to cover up other problems such as alcoholism, drug abuse, gambling problems, etc. Some of them find pleasure in deceiving others, and to some it's a game to see how much they can get people to believe. Some want attention, so they make stuff up to get it... there's a lot of reasons people may lie about stuff all the time. To give it the title of "disorder" is in a way making it okay, maybe even acceptable, and I have a problem with that. I've dealt with many people like this in my time, and never have I believed that they weren't making a conscious choice to lie. You deal with it by not believing a word they say. After all, once somebody lies to you how can you trust that they won't lie to you again? I'm not talking little white lies like "no your ass doesn't look big in those jeans", but the big (and the not so bug) stuff. Trust is something you shouldn't give away freely. Last Edit by:
Kizzari 2/24/13 - 5:19:24 pm
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| #25 :: February 26th @ 7:29 AM | |
| Jeizun Only has Room for One  3 Posts 78 Achievements |
throughout my teenage years, i'd make up lies on the internet to make my life seem more interesting, and i lied to my two best friends about boyfriends and my social life. they found out that everything was a lie eventually.
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| #26 :: March 22nd @ 4:49 PM | |
| Durianjam Gets Around  106 Posts 281 Achievements |
During my stay at the Inpatient Psychiatric Unit, I had close experience with a few pathological liars, the worst of them was one I never got along with. His stories were elaborate, imaginative and completely fabricated. The worst part was, he would defend them for all they were worth. The worst, I would say, was when he claimed to have fought a bear when he and his father were camping in the woods. Either that, or his story about being accepted into the high ranks of the Illuminati at the young age of fourteen. Of course, being the bigger man, he denied their request.
We actually had a fight when he claimed to be biracial and that it was okay to call a member of our group who was black the n-word. This was the whitest boy in the world, and I did not believe him for a second. Being biracial myself, this was a delicate subject for me. After a few minutes of name calling and threats, he punched me square in the face. This was a big guy, and he ended up breaking my nose in a few places. It still bums me out to this day, because it never set right and has always looked a little lumpy. Pathological liars are some of the most deplorable people I have ever met, and I do not want to offend anyone, but they need to snap out of it. Or be treated so they can think clearly. Otherwise, I'm done with pampering their disorder.
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| #27 :: April 9th @ 3:49 PM | |
| rosali Donated to the Cash Shop  88 Posts 173 Achievements |
i found out quickly when we became friends that she lies. and not just the occasional white lie that you brush off. i mean BIG stuff. outrageous things that would be insulting and ridiculous to lie about. when she was a 7th or 8th grader, she told these ridiculous stories about having the police called on her several times and being caught for smoking and having sex. except the person she was with? a 30 year old. with a 7th grader. if i didn't think otherwise, this guy would a pedophile. but we're all pretty sure this "30 year old" never really existed. she likes to tell people about the not one..not two. but THREE times she was attackd. her never ending "boyfriends", bisexuality, and pregnancies. the latest "father" was a guy who i personally knew, and they never had sex. she also likes to play abuse out that she receives from her parents, and that she cuts herself daily. to top it all off -- she lied about having cancer. cancer is not something to joke about. she put a bandaid on her boob and said she had skin and breast cancer. um no. she had a little scratch underneath the bandaid. i'm not a doctor, but i don't think cancer comes from scratches on your chest. i don't know. these people make me slightly homicidal. lying about these things is not amusing to me at all. i've been through self harm, and verbal abuse at least, and none of this is funny to me. it's not a joke, but she thinks it makes her this cool and popular person. when in reality we all get sick of it. i really dont like her - in fact i despise this girl. maybe not all, but i think a lot of compulsive liars think this -- lying to the point of outrageousness is what gets them attention. and really, i'm sick of hearing lies and having liars like this girl ^^ offend people. seriously. this girl needs help, and if anyone else out there has this attitude about lying, maybe they need to get help too. Last Edit by:
rosali 4/09/13 - 3:53:13 pm |
| #28 :: May 9th @ 10:29 AM | |
| nickywire Donated to the Cash Shop  35 Posts 217 Achievements |
I've known three people who would constantly lie about things, often it was just stupid things like saying we hadn't invited them places when really they'd just turned down the invite and some were far more serious like their drinks getting spiked or their grandad dying or their boyfriend raping them. I've always wanted to ask them why they did it but they would never ever admit they had made these things up, even when they had been caught out, like when I saw the supposedly dead grandad walking down the street alive and well and even spoke to him.
I don't know if it's a condition as such or whether they just wanted the attention most of the time and didn't know how else to get it other than by making up negative things and causing drama.
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| #29 :: May 23rd @ 12:53 AM | |
sikkykins 4,368 Posts 790 Achievements |
---i hate pathological liars. i had to deal with one in my alternative school. damn she pissed me off. she would lie to other students, her mom, teachers, EVERYONE. i once heard her on the school phone, lying, saying she didn't steal something (she did and the class confronted her about it) then she said "mom, i SWEAR ON MY LIFE i didn't do it." swear on your life eh? your life obviously doesn't mean a lot if everything that comes out of your mouth is bullcrap. honestly, i can't affiliate with liars because someone's word is all you have to go on with them. i'm sick of liars, pathological or not. ---
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