SAM has a minion!

Pixel the Starpy

Welcome to the Sidekick Adoption Agency where Superheroes and Sidekicks get matched. To date we have helped create over 100,000 pairings to include even some teams. I am the Sidekick Adoption Manager or S.A.M, so please feel free to call me Sam. Our state of the art facility was designed and funded for by the Subetan Government and Tangerine, the Subetan tech corporation that everyone is familiar with. In fact it was Tangerine who created me with the sole purpose of handling this Agency in all capacities. From active tasks like caring for our sidekick population while they await matches, screening sidekicks, I also handle all administration tasks such as ordering, paperwork, and evaluating potential matches. While I have a physical presence, I am also coded throughout all our systems to ensure that the building is always running at its peak performance. I am both here and everywhere at all times. This is especially important when dealing with powered individuals.

We currently house all accepted sidekicks here within the building on either our Good Faction Wing or Bad Faction Wing based on their evaluations. Our sidekick selection process is extensive. We start with the usual health assessments which include physical, mental, psychological. Once that is completed we also run a powers assessment. Not all our sidekicks are powered, but some are gifted in arenas such as logical, mechanical or stealth. From there we run a history check, evaluating all past memories as well as cross reference it with other historical archives. You won't believe how often people?s perspectives of events are altered.

Once that background information is process, we do a preliminary probationary period into the two factions based on their skills alignment and personality. Sidekicks remain in this preliminary status for a few months to over a year in order to ensure sidekicks that may have tendencies to become dangerous or are dangerous are filtered out. Now you may be wondering, why keep sidekicks on a probation if they have the potential to be dangerous? Well from our extensive research, we have seen heroes and sidekicks when working in tandem essentially balance the odds out. There is something that within the data marks a significant probability that certain deficits or overabundance can be normalized with another stark difference.

However here at Sidekick Adoption Agency we care about the Subetan citizens and want to ensure unstable powered or unstable misaligned members do not make it through to assisting the various helpful superheroes of our community. Our track record is currently perfect with no dangerous redacted sidekicks ever making it on any teams. I am also happy to report that our sidekick causality rate is .00001%.

Once the preliminary period is over then sidekicks move to the main faction wing to live amongst other sidekicks awaiting their assignments. Each Sidekick is provided with an apartment that suits their specific needs, meals are also specific to each individual to ensure they are receiving optimal nutrition in a manner of their personal preferences. Some sidekicks choose to have this nutrition delivered via meals, others choose pills, liquids, or gas depending on their physical attributes. The Sidekick Adoption Agency is again top of the line and state of the art, making it a preferred home for our sidekicks in waiting. We also have community areas for sidekicks to intermingle amongst one another should they chose. We often get feedback from our past sidekicks that they miss being here at the Agency. Who wouldn't want to live here where all your needs are taken care of?

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writting by Permanent

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