Information


Armistyx has a minion!

Ghost the Ghostling




Armistyx
Legacy Name: Armistyx


The Sweetheart Harvester
Owner: marvel

Age: 11 years, 11 months, 2 days

Born: April 26th, 2012

Adopted: 11 years, 11 months, 2 days ago

Adopted: April 26th, 2012


Pet Spotlight Winner
August 29th, 2019

Statistics


  • Level: 435
     
  • Strength: 612
     
  • Defense: 612
     
  • Speed: 612
     
  • Health: 612
     
  • HP: 289/612
     
  • Intelligence: 2,461
     
  • Books Read: 2339
  • Food Eaten: 8890
  • Job: Editor in Chief


=> BE THE HARDBOILED DETECTIVE.

You are now PROBLEM SLEUTH, the hardest-boiled detective of them all. Your GUN is loaded, your FLASK is full, and your pockets are stuffed with CANDY CORN. Everything's coming up Sleuth.

What will you do now?

=> BUILD DESK FORT.

Oh no. We're not getting into that again, no matter how much you buff your IMAGINATION stat.

=> EQUIP GUN.

What gun? All you have is this KEY.

=> SEARCH OFFICE.

Your office is pretty standard. There's a DESK, a WALL SAFE, a WINDOW, and a DOOR.

=> OPEN DOOR.

The door is being held shut by a MARBLE BUST in the hallway outside. Between this and the fines you keep getting from the city for violating the fire code, this door's getting to be a real concern.

=> OPEN SAFE.

You've, uh, misplaced the combination to this safe. It's locked up tight! There is, however, an UNPLEASANT NOTE from your neighbour and rival tucked away with it.

=> USE WINDOW.

Yeah, screw doors, you decide as you COMBAT ROLL through the office window. You're a free man now, baby. A free man covered in shards of broken glass.

=> SEARCH FOR CLIENTS.

Right. You ARE a detective, and you've got nothing of your own that needs detecting. Well, aside from the combination to your safe, the reason ACE DICK is leaving you UNPLEASANT NOTES, and who wedged your door shut with that EXTREMELY HANDSOME BUST.

ALMOST nothing. But what kind of GUNSLINGING GUMSHOE solves his own problems? Not the kind anyone wants to read about. For that, you need something SPICY to catch the audience's attention. Something MYSTERIOUS. Something SEXY. Something like...

=> BE HYSTERICAL DAME

You are now HYSTERICAL DAME.

HYSTERICAL DAME is essentially just PROBLEM SLEUTH in a wig and a JAUNTY LADY'S HAT. That BODICE looks like it could be useful, though.

=> WAIT, WHAT?

Yeah, it's that kind of story, buddy. This ain't even the half of it.

=> DON'T DO THAT AGAIN

Too bad.

You equip your CANDY CANE MYTHRIL JACKET and CAPTAIN'S HAT to become ADMIRAL SLEUTH. Some people might ask how wearing a captain's hat grants you the rank of admiral, but you're in charge of this vessel now, and that sounds like keelhauling talk.

=> HEY, WASN'T THAT COAT SUPPOSED TO BE A GIFT FROM A FRIEND?

We've only got room for one confusing multi-character in this story, all right?

=> OKAY, FINE. WHO ELSE IS IN THERE?

You unequip your NAUTICAL FINERY and replace it with a CLASSY TOP HAT and DASHING MUSTACHE to become the DAPPER SWAIN. Truly, you are the envy of all the fine gentlemen in this JAZZ ESTABLISHMENT.

=> THERE'S STILL MORE, ISN'T THERE.

You bet your sweet bippy, whatever that is.

You carve your GAMBIT SCHEMA into the flesh of this MYSTERIOUS ORANGE GOURD to become the CANDY CORN VAMPIRE. Your CANDY FANGS are precious and adorable.

=> UH OH.

What is that, a clown? You hate clowns.

And they hate you back.

=> AGGRESS.

You combine your ELF TEARS and other assorted FANTASY NONSENSE to unleash ARMISTYX, one of your deadliest abilities. DEATH HIMSELF lends you his SCYTHE for the purpose.

=> INEVITABLY SCREW AROUND INSTEAD.

Turns out Death's scythe makes an excellent teaspoon. Who knew?

=> FINISH THIS ALREADY.

You load your blade, the TECTRIX OF THE ARBITER, with INK. Now that you've dealt so much damage, you're ready to unleash your final COMB RAVE: SEPULCHRITUDE. You're looking pretty flashy in that armour, though maybe putting the laurel on top of your private eye's fedora was a little silly.

Boy, this is one spectacular cutscene. Look at you go. You've even summoned your greatest ally, the WEASEL KING, to help.

...That weasel's really flipping out, wow. He has some serious anger management issues.

=> CELEBRATE VICTORY.

Again with the desk fort? You know what, I don't even care anymore. At least it's better than your dance moves.


CREDITS

Story, background, and profile by marvel

Armistyx is a fanpet of Problem Sleuth, an MS Paint Adventures webcomic by Andrew Hussie

Pet Treasure


Heart Piece

Magic Enhancer

Suave Famous Fedora

Weathered Sailors Flask

Common Six-Shooter

Candy Corn

Antique Mild Dining Table

Blanket Fort Essentials

Stolen Cabin Key

Calavera Bride Heirloom Bust

Gray Lovely Lady Hat

Sugar Plum Bodice-Style Top

Candy Cane Jacket

White Officer Cap

White Top Hat

Gray Curly Mustache

Candy Vampire Pumpkin Plushie

Vampire Cloak

Scythe

Boxing Glove Clown Doll

The Truth About Clowns

Lovely Classic Teacup

Lovely Classic Saucer

Arid Spoon

Folded Wings

Raven Feather Quill Pen

Black Inkwell

Sword of Sparrows

Leaf Laurel

Roman Soldier Metal Kilt

Weasel Companion

Pet Friends