Wieners
Legacy Name: Wieners

Release the hounds!
Pitter patters off in the distance.
It's getting louder! Take cover, STAMPEDE!
Two tiny dachshunds come galloping up to you at full speed.

h, were you expecting something more... ferocious? I wouldn't do that to you! Here, let me introduce you. These are my weenies. They're twins, so good luck ever separating them for more than a moment! Their personalities really complement eachother, such a lovely dachshund duo of destruction. They might lick your hands to the bone if you don't stop them, but that's really all you've got to worry about. Well, that and their genetic predisposition to being tripwires. Watch yo'self.

This, ladies and gentlemen, is the goofiest little fluff bucket you've ever seen. If I wasn't so certain of their lineage, I'd swear his father was a stuffed animal. He spends his spare time rolling around in the stinkiest things he can find, licking cement, killing basketballs, and running into screen doors. He prefers mustard.

You gotta love a dog who gets beaten up by kittens on a regular basis. He's really pretty ridiuclous. Did you ever see the movie Up!? I'm convinced they based Dug on him. I demand royalties! And I wasn't kidding about the concrete. On warm summer days he'll spend a good hour in one spot on the patio, trying to lick clear through to China. One day he'll get there, and save us a whole heck of a lot of money on airfare! Oh, don't leave that on the picnic table! He'll jump up there and inhale it before you finish taking that breath.

And here wehave the very prim and proper princess. Except when you get in-between her and a snack. She's part garbage disposal. She enjoys long walks on the beach, being the little spoon, digging for buried treasure in the cat box, and licking the inside of noses. In that order. She prefers ketchup.

Her hotdog necklace has been passed down maternally for generations. Those are real pearls, their great great great great great great grandfather was a famous diving dachshund--he collected each and every one of them! If you were unaware, the hot dog is a religious symbol worn by many dachshunds in memoriam of those sausages who have given so much so that modern day weenies can enjoy life to the fullest.

Every summer both weens participate in the Wienerschinitzel Wiener Nationals. The race raises money for wiener awareness, and it's a cause very near and dear to their hearts. Our little dude always leaves the sausages in the dust, but the poor sweet girl isn't as seasoned as he. Try not to bring it up, she's a little bit touchy about her weight. She hasn't done as well in recent years as she used to. Seriously, she'll lick me to death me if she hears me telling you this!

She has some tricks up her coat, though. She's really quite, quite long. At a glance you don't notice it, but once she gets revved up, it can be problematic. She used to use this maneuver in combat that was referred to as Hundman's knot to strangle her opponents (and she looks so innocent, huh?), but after years of use, she gets herself tangled when she gets overstimulated sometimes. Careful! It isn't good for her back!

Overlay by Vela. Minion overlay by Mythica. Profile by Ariel. Coding by MidnightShadow. Profile art by Goth and fee. Other art by (in order): Slytherin, Rah, User not found: illusion x 2, Keshi.