Nintendork
Legacy Name: Nintendork

Hey man, it's Nintendo or no-go.

NINTENDORK (pr. nɪn-tɛnˈ-dɔrk)
1. someone who knows the games of Nintendo so fluently that they know all of the secret locations of stuff and what they are
2. an overly biased term used by Sony/Microsoft zealots to offend Nintendo zealots
(Source: Urban Dictionary)

He was that kid in grade school who knew too much about video games. He knew all the secrets, whether or not they were real.

He was the one who would talk about the Pok�gods and how to find Mew by using Strength on the truck by the S.S. Anne.

He was the kid who claimed you could get the Triforce by playing Song of the Gods, and that by using Din's Fire in just the right place, you could unfreeze Zora's Domain.

He swore you could jump over the flagpole at the end of World 3-3 in Super Mario Bros, and that you could find Luigi in Super Mario 64.

He discovered the cheat code that would let you play as Samus wearing nothing but a bikini, and when the rest of the world realized she was a girl, he never stopped gloating about it.

He spent hours trying to get that unreachable key in the snow level of Banjo Kazooie, and he swore it was a sign that the game would be linked to its sequel somehow.

Up-up-down-down-left-right-left-right-B-A was his mantra, and he seemed to believe that all the secrets of the universe could be cracked by that simple code.

Sometimes he was the envy of the class, sometimes he was the perfect punching bag. You could be awed by his knowledge one minute and irritated by him the next.

They called him "geek", "loser", "freak", "Walking Gaming Encyclopedia", "know-it-all."

They called him "Nintendork."

And little did they know, he was infinitely proud of the last one.

-Games and characters mentioned are copyright to their respective owners. Namely Nintendo. (And Konami.)
-TC slots and items are about 99% thanks to ZeldaAssassin.