Simian has a minion!

Maine Coon the Kittito


The Nostalgic Chelon
Owner: Trithie

Age: 9 years, 1 month, 3 weeks

Born: October 15th, 2010

Adopted: 9 years, 1 month, 3 weeks ago

Adopted: October 15th, 2010

Pet Spotlight Winner
July 10th, 2018


  • Level: 1,195
  • Strength: 3,543
  • Defense: 2,429
  • Speed: 2,369
  • Health: 4,362
  • HP: 4,234/4,362
  • Intelligence: 2,072
  • Books Read: 1537
  • Food Eaten: 1224
  • Job: Deputy Director

Simian liked candy. A lot. Honestly, to say he just “liked it” was probably a massive understatement. He lived for candy. It didn’t matter what kind it was, as long as it satisfied his sweet tooth, he was happy.

The day began like any other day. Simian woke up, ate breakfast (licorice today), and brushed his teeth. He took a good look in the mirror, and seeing his normal-looking chelon self staring back, he gave himself a thumbs-up. It was time to start his daily rounds to the various candy shops in town.

Stop one was typical. The dilemma shopkeeper knew he was coming, and had already prepared a bag of his favourites. He paid, left the shop and popped a taffy in his mouth as he walked up the road to stop number two. He came out empty handed and disappointed, it seemed that they hadn’t restocked his favourite type of lollipop.

It was a fair walk to shop number three, but Simian wasn’t one to rush. He wandered in the general direction, but would occasionally stop to admire window displays in shopfronts or to bend down and sniff a particularly attractive flower. Everything was normal until, out of the corner of his eye, he saw something new. A different shop sign? But what had happened to the furniture store that had been there? And the new shop was called... Sweet Tooth?

He hurried over to it, rubbing his hands together greedily, hoping against hope that this was a new candy store. It was. It was the most amazing candy shop he’d ever seen. Canisters of colourful jelly beans adorned the far wall. Bins full of gummies. An entire section dedicated entirely to chocolates. Lollipop displays on every available surface. Simian was in heaven.

He began exploring the displays, trying not to grab everything at once. He had to keep his cool. Then he heard a whisper.

”Hey you,” it said, “hey bud, you like candy, huh?”

Simian looked around, but couldn’t see anyone. A bit confused, he nodded.

”I got something for ya, then,” said the voice. “Follow me”

Still trying to find the voice, Simian looked around in confusion.

”Down here, bud.” Simian looked down and finally saw the source of the voice. It was just a cybill. The cybill waved in a ‘hurry up’ kind of motion and headed towards the back of the store. Simian followed, through a doorway into the back of the shop. The cybill went behind a desk, and while Simian couldn’t see what he was doing, the next moment a small trapdoor opened in the floor.

”Let’s go,” said the cybill, “I haven’t got all day, here.”

And so Simian descended down the ladder into what appeared to be a candy mecca. He’d thought there was a lot of candy in the shop, but that was nothing compared to down here. Candy was everywhere. There was hardly a path to walk through. But the cybill kept going, so Simian continued to follow. Through a hidden doorway the cybill opened by pulling on a hanging display of candy necklaces, and then they entered a gloomy looking back room.

The room contained only one desk, and sitting behind it was another cybill, this one elderly but with three giant scars marring his face.

”So you managed to find one,” said the old cybill, “he’s not quite what I was looking for, but I guess he’ll do. Give him the crystal.”

And then Simian felt a pressure on his shell, like someone was pushing something into it. He spun around trying to get a look at what the cybill had done to him, but his neck couldn’t quite crane that way.

”Don’t worry bud, we’ve just added a little something shiny to your shell. You’ll be fine. You’ll be better than fine, just you wait. All the candy you could ever want... all we want is for you to do us a few... favours.”

When he returned home, a bit dazed and confused, he immediately ran to a mirror where he could see a shiny green crystal in the middle of his shell. His arms were too short to try to get it off himself, but when he asked for help none of his brothers or sisters could make it budge. He gave up.

The next morning, he woke up famished. He dug out his candy stash from under the bed, and tossed an entire pack of gummy candies into his mouth.

He went to get ready for his morning rounds, but, passing a mirror he did a double take. He’d always been a bit pudgy, but he’s become lean and muscular overnight. He turned around, and the crystal was glowing ever so slightly.

Simian decided to go back to the candy shop to find out what was going on. But once he got to it, it was... gone? And the furniture shop was back. What was going on? He went into the furniture shop to inquire, but the shopkeeper had no idea what he was talking about, no sir, they had been open yesterday, why, she had sold the most beautiful rug and would you be interested in this very unique lamp? He left, completely stumped.

Then, he heard a whisper in the back of his head. It was the old cybill. “Go to an open field, Simian,” it said, “let’s see what you can do.” He felt a compulsion to follow the order, and ended up in a deserted park. It felt as though someone had control over his body. He grabbed a stick and began an amazing sequence of martial arts. Simian had no idea what was happening, but figured that at least he looked pretty cool doing whatever he was doing.

”Not too bad,” said the voice of the old cybill. This time though, the voice sounded more distant, as if it were speaking to someone else. “I think we can make this work as an assassin.”

Simian was startled. He couldn’t stop his body from moving, but he tried to cry out in his head to protest.

”Now, boy, none of this, you belong to us now. Don’t worry, we’ll pay you well, you’re never going to run out of candy. But now, let’s talk about that favour we needed. You’re going to let us take control, and we’re going to go and... deal with someone who’s done us wrong. Okay? Don’t worry, you’ll get your body back once the job’s done.”

Unable to do anything else, Simian nodded and let go of his mind.

And with that, Simian had unwittingly joined the Subetan Candy Mafia.

overlay: frederick
profile: beer
story: Trithie
Vector art via Vecteezy

Pet Treasure

Strawberry Blingpop

Cherry Rock Candy

Cherry Sweet Hard Candy

Cherry Gummy Rings

Strawberry Laces

Cherry Tub of Gummy Worms

Bloody Angry Gummy Balls

Root Beer Barrels

Candy Deluxe Dipped Apple

Darkside Candy Fan

Homemade Raspberry Jam

Runaway Hot Chocolate

Strawberry Fruit Jelly Candy

Cherry Fun Times Taffy

Peppermint Swirl Cookies

Peppermint Macarons

Fabulous Ice Lolly

Cherry Heart Cake

Raspberry Heart Pastry

Raspberry Drizzled Marshmallow Pop

Peppermint Strawberry Pavlova

Lovey Cake

Bubble Gum Crushed Candy Crystals

Strawberry Taffy

Bubble Gum Unicorn Cotton Candy

Sweet Strawberry Snack Mix

Delicious Strawberry Cone

Pomegranate Fireside Teacake

Bubble Gum Lollipop Bundle

Powdered Sugar Tarts

Strawberry Frozen Flower Pop

Deliciously Cold Raspberry Ice Cream

Chocolate Peppermint Cookies

Strawberries and Cream Lolly

Gum Filled Grape Sucker

Purple Candy Sticks

Celebratory Mori Cupcake

Grape Sourpower Candy

Wild Wild Berry Fruit Leather Roll

Grape Striped Candy

Grape Egg Cream

Grape Fondant Strawberry

Mixed Berry Sundae

Violet Gum Pack

Grape Flavored Hard Candy

Jar of Sugarplum Stick Candy

Grape Flavored Suspicious Gummy Bear

Galaxy Space Pop

Antifreeze Fruit Dead Lolly

Blueberry Chocolate Ball

Ammonia Deadly Bonbon

Blue Raspberry Licorice

Blueberry Heart Lolly

Blue Raspberry Ultra Bubble Gum

Gummy Snolm Tails

Minterific Cake Pops

Blueberry Fairy Wing Lolly

Shengui Guo Gummy Fan

Cursed Blueberry Hard Candy

Fruity Berry Smoothie

Blue Cotton Kanis Tail

Blueberry Bubbling Vial

Stylishly-Frosted Doughnut

Winter Ice Jelly Cakes

Minty Sugar Wafers

Mint Gelato

Green Peppermint

Apple Flavored Ice

Lime Hard Ranchy

Lime Cherry Gelatin Shot

Large Sour Grape Medley Dust Stick

Green Apple Licorice Wheel

Apple Tub of Gummy Worms

Limey Hard Candy

Apple Fruit Chews

Field Candy Bracelet

Chocolate Lime Slices

Lime Ghostly Pop

Sugar Coated Lemon Star

Butterscotch Candies

Banana Whoopie Pie

Hard Slice Lemon Candy

Banana Trifle

Lemon Coated Popcorn

Lemon Sour Blaster

Banana Chocolate Covered Cake Balls

Gold Bonbon

Lemon Freeze Pop

Chewy Banana-Chocolate Candy

Nectar Drops

Wrapped Candy Corn Gumball

Spiced Pumpkin Roll

Pumpkin Macarons

Orange Cotton Candy

Orange Coffin Pop

Orange Cream Cake Cocktail

Cursed Cinnamon Gummy Candy

Rolled Pumpkin Candy

Candy Corn

Orange Marmalade

Strawberry Shortcake Ice Cream Bar

Cosmic Kamleo Lollipop

Lychee Pressed Flower Shortbread Cookie

Orange Marshmallow Wings

Ice Cream with Orange Sauce

Honey Sesame Snaps

Chocolate Layered Pumpkin Cheesecake

Sugared Pumpkin Doughnuts

Cinnamon Butter

Nutty Crunch Chocolate-Covered Strawberries

Fancy Dotted Dark Chocolate

Liquor-Filled Truffles

Malted Milk Balls

Chocolate Peanut Butter Cup

Strawberry Dipped Pretzel Sticks

Chocolate and Cream Cake Balls

Chocolate Candy Pane Cookie

Chocolate Spider Bark

Gummy Soda Bottles

Mini Cappuccino Chocolate Cube

Simple Chocolate Truffle

Fun Size Chortles Candy Bar

Dark Chocolate Alegarten Cake

Gooey Pumpkin Spice Truffle

Blondie Pumpkin Brownie

Almond Brittle

Soft Caramel Candies

Flower Latte

Chocolate Eggnog

Hard Caramel Candy

Peanut Brittle

Chocolate Chip Cookie Lolly

Chocolate Alegarten Kreppel

Gingerbread Milkshake

Marshmallow Pumpkin Cheesecake Slice

White Chocolate Truffles

Chocolate Dipped Shortbread Cookies

Vanilla Ice Cream Cone

Yellow Fairy Wings Cookie

Swirly Caramel Salt Water Taffy

Vanilla Macarons

Vanilla Milkshake

Nine Sugared Doughnut Holes

BBQ Marshmallows

Vanilla Chai Cupcake

Lovingly Wrapped Butter Cookies

Sweet Vanilla Vesnali Cupcake

Coconut Lucky Cake

Mystery Ridiculously Juicy Fruit Chews

Wafer Candy

Pet Friends