Zamorak has a minion!

Zar'ik the Jamba


The Hydrus Devonti
Owner: Haiku

Age: 8 years, 7 months, 4 weeks

Born: November 6th, 2011

Adopted: 2 years, 7 months, 3 weeks ago

Adopted: November 9th, 2017

Pet Spotlight Winner
October 21st, 2019


  • Level: 100
  • Strength: 100
  • Defense: 100
  • Speed: 100
  • Health: 100
  • HP: 100/100
  • Intelligence: 100
  • Books Read: 100
  • Food Eaten: 100
  • Job: Angrybeard's Sous Chef

What is waiting for us, the sea keeps silent;
Thirst to live drives hearts to their bottoms,
But life here costs nothing
— the life of others, but not yours!

Thar be a legend t' be said about th' sea, one o' many more t' try 'n explain its glory 'n another t' be said about its creatures. I be nah natterin' about fish or sharks here, no, but somethin' deeper than th' usual. Har! Grab ya chair 'n sit tight fer th' tale, heartie, fer 'twill explain lots more than ye reckon.
I was jus' a normal lad in me younger days, I lover o' th' sea 'n great admirer o' those tales jus' like ye, me bucko. I would sit by th' boats 'n hear all about th' fishermen tales o' mermaids 'n sea creatures, wha' can says I, I was quite th' adventurer back then. I joined a crew o' pirates t' go out thar when I was a bit older 'n try me luck wit' treasures 'n island expeditions, cutlass fightin' 'n who knows I might even draw attention o' th' pretty lasses from th' village.
Th' thin' be, I was a nice lookin' lad — I still am, despite th' sea growths here 'n thar... Ahem, well, I was nah too smart t' realise th' crew hands would be harassin' me. See they were all scarred or smelly or had some rotten tooth or no teeth at all, so I was fresh meat. Th' cap'n hisself was a mighty jealous scallywag, fer they were all so used wit' ugliness 'n creep. Funny he seemed so excited t' welcome me t' th' rest o' th' crew.
At me first day, I got pushed t' me limit - th' humiliatin' rite o' passage included a lot o' punchin'. Th' cap'n then came t' me, aft I was well-nigh drowin' in me owns blood, 'n showed me this pretty shillin' he had.

See 'twas a different kind o' a shillin' fer sure. 'twould shine as brightly as any diamond, yet its metallic glow could nah be said t' be gold nor silver nah bronze. 'twas somethin' different. Exotic I'd dare t' say! "Ye see newbie, I don't care who joins us, fer it ain't in me power t' decide yer worth; 'tis th' ocean's itself", th' cap'n said wit' a smirk, his rotten breath so close t' me ear I could be sick, if I wasn't numb enough. "We'll flip th' shillin'; head ye live, tail ye die".
Aye me fellow companion, I was in th' middle o' th' ocean that time, no where t' run. All I could do that time was keep it together 'n pray fer th' most enlighted bein' up thar in th' sky t' help me 'n save me soul, fer I was damned either way. They flipped th' shillin'.

Funny thin' about this whole thin' be, th' shillin' fell t' th' ground straight t' a hole in th' middle o' th' plank t' th' floor, so 'twas neither heads nor tails. Th' crew all together put on a blank face, 'n one could nigh-on smell th' fear in th' air. Th' cap'n seemed t' be in shock. He turned back 'n ran t' th' wheel but 'twas way too late then. Th' sea was turnin' 'n a storm seemed t' come our way. Uh, I was too weak t' do anythin', so I jus' lied thar, lookin' at th' strangely positioned shillin'. Everybody was frenzied 'n rushin' thar tasks t' set sail back t' solid ground but thar was no time left, har, fools.
Somethin' dragged th' galleon t' its side but whence I stood I could only see a pale-ish tentacle graspin' its way up, 'n I could hear th' most beautiful voice I'd ever heard. I didn' make much o' it, lad was I numb from all th' hittin' 'n kickin' t' me face. But I was smart enough t' hide th' shillin' safely in me pocket. Th' tentacles grabbed me 'n I passed out.

Me queen saved me, or as she said, she claimed me t' her 'n I be bound t' eternity by her side, me rescuer 'n tormentor. Wit' th' lucky shillin' by me side, I mutated 'n turned t' a loyal servant o' th' sea thanks t' her. 'n now, I be free t' roam th' ocean in th' search o' adventures 'n treasures, o' course, under th' eyes o' me queen. But aft all... That be th' life I always wanted. Ne'er could I picture it this way, sure, yet 'tis surprisingly good.

And during the last instant
a wave rose,
And a shout was heard:
"Land is ahead!"

— — —

Adopted from vvitch!
Story and art by me (Haiku);
Profile coding: FallenSamurai;
Background image from Images Pond;
Lyrics: Schtiel (translated) by Rammstein.

Pet Treasure

Gold Bee Collar Charm


Great White Shark

Mimic Kraken

Ominous Plank

Ship Porthole

Shipmaster Spyglass

Vivid Pirate Pearls

Ship in a Beanbag

Shipwreck Plushie

Lonely Foghorn

Carved Jade Legeica Statue

Ocean Grit

Arcade Tokens

Kings Booty

Brass Panzer Hydra Medal

Lucky Coin

Misplaced Rings

Pulled Gold Teeth

Freyalise Plushie

Tempest in a Teacup

Baby Hydra

Stubby Shark Tooth

Sea Charts

Desert Priestess Jeweled Vulture Headdress Wing


Belted Glass Drinking Flask

Mermaid Tear

Reliquary Creature

Ink of the First King

Cheap Fish Hook

Anchor Plushie

Collected Correspondence

Hand-honed Miniature Sica

Battered Golden Doubloons

Queen Booty

Tattered and Bloody Pirate Flag

Seabed Long Poster

Subeta Landmarks Photo Album


Ship in a Bottle

Shell of Venus

Skull of Gold Coins

Tears of Merana Statuette

Tarnished Gold Disks

Siren Stein

Silver Shark Doll

Sea Charts

Rainyday Desert Rose Earrings

Este Evvu Skipari Painting Brush

Dry Gin

Friendly Lake Monster Doll

Old Coins

Water Damaged Book

Very Fresh Pearl

Tub Scrubbing Brush

Ominous Tan Fabric Burlap Doll

Old Compass

Wanderlust Fabric Scrap

Verdi Sidhe Ancient Locket

Unlucky Boat

Trio of Golden Statues

Stolen Aztec Coin

Pile of Treasured Tomes

Vase Reliquary

Old Wooden Picture Frame

Marez Jahira Eye Crystal

Marez Itzatul Jeweled Earrings

Tumbled Jade Beads


Marez Xochi Shell Necklace

Marez Itzatul Sandal Charm

Marez Itzatul Jeweled Armlet

Marez Itzatul Fancy Headdress

Marez Ashar Powdered Gold

Hazard Map

Golden Square Brooch

Bundle of Old Maps


Marez Xochi Lip Gloss

Squat Reliquary

Marez Itzatul Exotic Potpourri

Imported Jade Clasp

Golden Kahaleitzli Bust

Este Evvu Skipari Hand-Painted Pot

Dangerous Pirate Map


Airship in a Bottle

Monkey Blood

Marez Xochi Tattoo Kit

Marez Itzatul Polished Stone Mirror

Marez Itzatul Jeweled Comb

Marez Itzatul Beaded Necklace

Marez Ashar Eye Potion

Lesser Nobility Plushie



Heavy Magnifying Glass

Golden Flower Brooch

Golden Disk and Feathers

Giselle Thrift Rat Belt

Este Evvu Skipari Torc

Divider Calipers

Cask of Rum

Book of Sea Shanties

Bitten and Bent Doubloon

Big Sack of Fine Jewels

Big Book of Sailing Superstitions

Pet Friends

Aye aye, me ole matey!

I be cook in th... WHAT.