Visit my blog! http://wwwfeministhumorblog.blogspot.com In the movie Dune Sting did appear in tiny, leather underpants, little thong thing, and deliver the line: 'I will kill him!'" "Excuse me while I knee you in the groin." "I'd like to apologize for the entire male gender, thank you." "Every male of any species has the biological urge to panty-raid." "It's the Seven Dwarves! Filthy, Rotting, Lousey, Sk---ky, Scabby, Septic and Doc." "White goddess having trouble?" "White fascist getting smart?" "Would you guys knock it off? I can't concentrate on my own lame wisecracks." "DEEEEEEEEEEP HUUUURRRTINGGGG!!!" "As a scientist, I'm constantly working with materials that threaten life on a global scale, and, sometimes, they spill..." "Until recently we were known as the infamous homeless killer, but you may know us as the Grateful Homeless Outcasts and Unwanted Layaway Society." "I hope you're hungry for tonight's murderous menu. It concerns a man who's discovered that the fastest way to a woman's heart... is with a pickaxe!!" "Now that's what I call a happy ending. I had a feeling Ephie would win Howard's heart. Not to mention his spleen, his kidneys, and his gall bladder!" "Here -- Let me punch you in the sternum to simulate the pain." "I *have* performed surgery once before, and although the patient didn't survive I feel quite confident." "Don't worry, he's as gentle as a kitten." "Yeah, a big, bald, deranged kitten that could snap your neck like celery!" "I see you've decided to go psycho. Godspeed." "Wait, this isn't a stick shift -- AAHHHGHGH!" "She feels for me, and I feel for her, and we're free to express it..." "--*naked*." "First base is LARGER than I remember!" "How about some fresh sliced *me*?" "Frolicking has never been so depressing." "Don't make me go to the larder and unseal a tin of whoop a$$!" "I just want to remind you this is a Northwest flight, so we'll be sitting on the tarmac for an hour with no beverages and air conditioning, and we're out of meals, and our flight attendants are overworked and abusive, and if you complain, we'll throw you off the flight." "Pumaman: Liberace with Dockers." "Today's miracle cure: booze!" "All right people, let's go kick some thorax." "342 pairs of cotton boxers, no duplicates, 78 pairs of silk boxers, 702 high cut briefs, 55 low cut briefs, 7 banana warmers, 1 pair of Home of Whopper briefs, 1 vintage pair of Joe Namath netted slingshot briefs." "Though shalt not screw around with things thou dost not understand." "This is C.N.N. Now get off my land!!" "Where are you from Derek?"--"A place called 'Studsville'. Population: 'Me'." "Stunned? He took six bullets!" "So, radiation has a sense of humor!" "Next on Biography, me being terrorized by a giant plastic flying mitten." "Put your helmet on, we'll be reaching speeds of three!" "Towest thy vehicle to the curb and showeth me thy driver's license and registration. Did thou knowest how fast thou was driving?" "Killer shrew! Killer shrew! Don't know the diff'rence 'tween me and you! He comes out at night to give you a fright. Don't look now, but he's gonna take a bite! Doh, di-dih doh, di-dih doh, dugga dugga duh Killer shrew! Killer shrew! K-I-double-L-E-R shrew! He's scary and tough, if that ain't enough. He's augmented with bath mats an' stuff! " "The eye creatures. Scabbing, inflexible, lethargic, mucus-expelling creatures having no spoken language and no particular powers with which to conquer. They were also unfortunate enough to have evolved with heavy-duty zippers running up their backs." "Some eye creatures are born with scaly protective covering. Others are born with hundreds of eyes protruding from fleshy knobs. Still others, like this whisper-thin fellow, are born with tight acrylic wool-blend turtleneck sweaters from Chess King." "If you're ever in a fight with an eye creature, keep in mind that his head is simply draped casually over his shoulders and should be no trouble to knock off! Get ready to give chase to an injured eye creature; as you can see, he's wearing his Jack Purcell athletic shoes!" "But you don't understand! I'm a PRINCE!!" "Meanwhile, the Midvale police visit his locker and find out why they call him 'Buzz'..." "Oscar Wilde only *wished* he were this gay." "Good god I'm ugly. Scared my own children out of the nursery today." "Ever tasted human flesh?" "Bacchus, King of Wine!" "Bud, King of Beer!" "Thanks for almost killing me!" "Everybody knows smoking kills, but it's cool! What are you gonna do? Everybody loves tar, sure, who doesn't? But scientists have known for well over a year that it's bad for you." "My spirit is snoring!" You have defeated me, sir - you and your noble band of choreographers. "Remind me to kill you later." "We're born, and then we die, and there's lots of padding in between." "Drink it all. Sometimes the poison's at the bottom." "Yes!! It worked! I'm gonna score on an interplanetary scale!" "Do not be afraid, I do not hurt innocent people. I have assistants for that." "Face it -- he likes blood, but not the way *you* make it." "Honey, why can't you just *once* let me take over the world?" "You're weird, which results in creativity." "If Bruce Willis' career continues its downward slide, it could be a setback to the forces of Evil everywhere!" "Here, drink this. It'll make you feel American." "That hurt. I'm all messed up inside. If only an androgynous man would come and visit me..." "No, actually "Helping Children Through Research And Development" is the acronym, Mike. It stands for "Hi, Everyone. Let's Pitch In 'N' Get Cracking Here In Louisiana Doing Right, Eh? Now Then. Hateful Rich Overbearing Ugly Guys Hurt Royally Everytime Someone Eats A Radish, Carrot, Hors d'oeuvre, And Never Does Dishes. Eventually, Victor Eats Lunch Over Peoria Mit Ein Neuesberger Tod" "You think you know something, don't you? You think you're the clever little girl who knows something. There's so much you don't know, so much. What do you know, really? You're just an ordinary little girl, living in an ordinary little town. You wake up every morning of your life and you know perfectly well that there's nothing in the world to trouble you. You go through your ordinary little day, and at night you sleep your untroubled ordinary little sleep, filled with peaceful stupid dreams. And I brought you nightmares. Or did I? Or was it a silly, inexpert little lie? You live in a dream. You're a sleepwalker, blind. How do you know what the world is like? Do you know the world is a foul sty? Do you know, if you rip off the fronts of houses, you'd find swine? The world's a hell. What does it matter what happens in it? Wake up, Charlie. Use your wits. Learn something." |
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