Zilch has a minion!

Love me but don't find out I'm the Evil Goop


The Custom Riftborn Blob
Owner: Luck

Age: 6 months, 2 weeks, 5 days

Born: May 18th, 2021

Adopted: 6 months, 2 weeks, 5 days ago

Adopted: May 18th, 2021


  • Level: 111
  • Strength: 151
  • Defense: 10
  • Speed: 10
  • Health: 10
  • HP: 0/10
  • Intelligence: 206
  • Books Read: 205
  • Food Eaten: 0
  • Job: Secret Keeper

[Information] - Themes - Credits


Zilch or Mr. Zilch

it / they / he




Impossibly Light



Neutral Evil

Information - [Themes] - Credits


Gypsy Shoe
This Way To The Egress

Knock Knock
This Way To The Egress

Delicious Cabaret
This Way To The Egress

Live Through Your Strings
This Way To The Egress

On A 45
This Way To The Egress

Make It Out Alive
This Way To The Egress

Information - Themes - [Credits]


Coding Advice:

Coding Majority:


Character & Story:

Art Pieces:
(X)(X)(X)(X)(X) by Luck
(X) by anonymous

A broadcast for all inhabitants...

It felt like I had woken up for the first time in my life that day. It was as if nothing had existed before then, as I stood there sentient and fully grown, knowing full well that things had in fact existed before that moment. My memories slowly came back to remind me that I was a person with a past, with a family, but I didn't know where I was, and I had no memory of how I got there, as I looked around and became aware that I wasn't alone, either. I was in the middle of a massive and lavish party, somewhere that seemed to be a hotel or a casino, or maybe both. Lively big band music was playing as 1920s flappers danced - everyone was swing dancing - except for myself. I was the only one standing still and looking around in awe. My attempts to communicate with the others were futile as they remained dancing. Where were we? How did we get here? No one else flinched as an oppressive atmosphere crept in. That was when the creature made an appearance.

The creature was humanoid and towered above the crowd - it must have been eight feet tall, although it lacked an actual head, and instead it possessed what seemed to be a floating chess board in place of it. The grayscale creature made its way up onto the stage with the big band, bouncing goofily like an old cartoon, before taking the microphone with a gloved, floating hand. A crackly, Mid-Atlantic accent which sounded like it was being filtered through an antique radio somehow produced from the chess board.

"Ladies and gentlemen, it is I, your wonderful host, the amazing Mr. Zilch!" The floating board changed from chess into a sign that read APPLAUSE as the big band's music waned, and the creature waved its hands as playing cards flew from its gaping sleeves in a flurry, magically and stylishly orbiting the entity before flying back into their origin points.

All at once the crowd rotated to face the creature, applauding and cheering loudly, but missing the cue, I remained silent. The creature on stage seemed to pause in the way one does when they think they hear a strange sound but dismiss it, and it continued, "whaddya say, folks? Is this not the greatest party of all time?" The crowd cheered in unison as I observed, and the creature paused in that peculiar way again. The floating board spun rapidly before up-righting again, this time displaying a looping, black and white film of someone's eyes darting back and forth. "Hmm," it mumbled into the microphone. "Interesting… Carry on, my adoring fans, and won't some of you join me at the card tables? Don't worry about the cards up my sleeve, as they're only for parlor tricks, but I've got quite the poker face!" The board changed again to read LAUGHTER and the crowd erupted into such.

I looked around at the cackling party-goers, perplexed, before returning my gaze to the creature and I felt a chill run up my spine. Although the chess board lacked eyes, the way the creature stood there still on stage, it felt like it was staring right at me and I let out a nervous chuckle. The moment seemed to last a lifetime before it calmly exited the stage and the music continued in full force once more. My heart was racing as I watched it stride towards the casino area, with a portion of the crowd practically riding his coattails in adoration. Soon, it was seated at one of the card tables, laughing loudly and surrounded by people.

I suddenly broke in the opposite direction, shoving dancers aside as I reached what I thought were the entrance doors to the hotel, only to fling them open and find more of the hotel interior. Door after door and hallway after hallway, it seemed like a never ending maze as I became desperate for a way out. Some doors led to what looked like an average hotel room, but on attempting to enter it, only led to another hallway somehow. I was sweating - I was crazed.

Suddenly, salvation. I had flung open a door and entered a room which stayed a room and I was able to take a look around. Rather than a hotel room, it looked much like an average office, and I began to rummage. I yanked on all the drawers on the filing cabinet but none opened, until I checked the desk drawers and found a key, which I tried on the filing cabinet once more. Empty, empty, empty - a plump folder! It possessed a strange mark on the outside.

Opening it, I searched for clues. There was an extended list of names that were all crossed out, and I didn't recognize what I was reading until I reached the bottom and found the only name that was not crossed out: Earth. The only conclusion I could draw was that it was a list of planets, most of which I'd never heard of, but why? Frowning in concentration, I shifted to the next paper which seemed to be a clipping of a newspaper I didn't recognize, from a place whose name I had only read a few moments prior as it was on the list above Earth. The Subeta Tribune read as followed:

Cryptid or Confirmed?
SAI's Suspicious Secrets

Yet another mysterious entity sent shockwaves through Subeta as of late, as reports are coming in of the possible existence of the most powerful and evil creature our lands have ever encountered. Originating in the dense population of Centropolis, the cryptid has left its mark leaving many families wondering the whereabouts of their loved ones who came in contact with it. Our team was not able to conduct interviews with any of the witnesses, as the SAI organization allegedly has them all in holding, along with all information known about the creature, none of which has been declassified. Public outcry continues to rise as residents demand their right to the truth in order to protect themselves, as well as the release of the witnesses. Some reports speculate that the SAI itself created and released the creature, due to their secrecy. Indeed, one can only wonder what they are hiding.
To my astonishment, the aforementioned classified files were conveniently next in the stack, and I wondered how they'd been obtained. Desperate for answers, I couldn't stop myself from poring over the page.

Subeta Agency of Investigation
ME-100 Incident Report & Summary

In an empty lot in the Lower West Side area of Centropolis, a group of 100 residents instantaneously appeared from thin air. The victims were dazed and confused, hysterical, or deceased, and the numbers were assessed as follows:

24 out of 100 had severe self-inflicted damage to their eyes and were placed in psychiatric wards
61 out of 100 were found unharmed but suffering from amnesia pertaining to the incident
13 out of 100 were found dead and autopsies could not provide a cause of death
2 out of 100 did not have as much amnesia and were able to be interviewed

Corroborating the two separate interviews, the following summary was able to be extracted, noting here that ME stands for "mysterious entity". Included on the following page are the full transcripts of the interviews.

ME-100 is a humanoid figure approximately 244 centimeters in height, very slender, and possesses a floating chess board in place of a head. ME-100 took the role of an entertainer and wears a gray suit with a high collar and possesses two detached, floating white gloves. ME-100 was observed to gain life force from an amiable atmosphere, and conversely is injured by a tense atmosphere. The victims are assimilated into a hivemind and are made to enjoy its party as it feeds. It is possible to break out of the trance, but it is not understood how. ME-100 either possesses the ability to teleport or fabricate entire locations. When angered, ME-100 morphs into something unknown which cannot be viewed safely, causing the minds of victims to rapidly deteriorate and to gouge their own eyes out. Its current location is unknown.
The rest seemed to be personal information about the victims, and the interview page was missing, so I moved on. I rustled through the remainder of the file and a photo fell to the floor. I reached for it, but yanked my hand back as if the photo were a striking snake. It was indescribable - incomprehensible - both the subject of the photo and the quality of the photo itself, as though the camera had broken beyond repair in its attempt to capture it. The sight of the thing in the corrupted photo terrified me to my core and I fell to the floor, scattering the contents of the file around me.

In stark contrast there were many other photos of normal people who seemed very happy, and as I pushed them around, looking at them all, I froze again. There was a photo of me. Like the others, I looked as though I was enjoying myself. Inspecting it more closely, I realized that the photo was taken in the same location as where I had woken earlier. I was stunned, but interrupted by the creature's voice that sounded from a speaker in the corner of the room.

"A broadcast for all inhabitants," it began, followed by a pause and I could imagine the way it had paused on stage earlier, "you should really mind your own business."

I grabbed the photo of myself and scrambled to my feet, nearly running on all fours as I struggled to get out of the room. Adrenaline pumping, I was in the maze of hallways again, trying door after door in an attempt to escape. Quickly, I found the way back to the lobby where all the other people were and in a moment I felt mild relief as though I weren't alone, and if I could wake the others--

A gloved hand grabbed my wrist from behind. "And where do you think you're going?" I knew it was the creature before I even turned around, and as I turned, I could start to see the same incomprehensible subject from the photo earlier. I shut my eyes tight and ran towards the crowd, breaking free of the creature's grasp. I practically tackled the oblivious party-goers as I shouted at the top of my lungs for them to wake up, because there was a monster.

I kept my back to the creature and I heard it ask in a distorted voice, "monster? I am the greatest entertainer of all time. You are the one who's ruined everything, you're the monster." I began slapping the other people and could see that they were slowly coming to their senses, while the creature continued, "I should have killed you earlier when I detected the dissonance."

Some of the people who were coming out of their trance started to collapse and scream in terror, attempting to claw their own eyes out and I lunged in an effort to stop them. "No! Don't look at him!" I yelled at them, but it was too late. Many of the people who were around me collapsed into convulsions, screaming after laying eyes on the incomprehensible; some even perished. The entire party was waking up and those furthest away could hear the screams and commotion and began to flee in the opposite direction as the creature snarled. The sounds it was making escalated and it sounded like an animal being tortured, as though it was in pain from seeing the people in pain.

It screamed and I shut my eyes again before I could finish seeing the thing that flew past me and up towards the ceiling, rattling the chandelier, and all at once, the creature was silent again. I opened my eyes and it was gone, and so was the hotel. We were just a group of scared and confused people in the woods, and as I stood there in awe similarly to when I had first awoken, watching those who were still alive and sighted scatter through the wilderness in search of civilization, I again wondered what happened. Where were we? How did we get here? My legs gave out and I sat among the bodies until the police showed up.

What was that thing?

Back To Top

Pet Treasure

Zero Sticker

Happy Smiley Sticker

Happy Face Eraser

Large Happy Face Ring

Happy Subeta

Drink Champagne Sticker

The Party 411

Party Time

Party Ideas

Dance on the Table Sticker




Grazia Double Bass


Antique Mild Round Dining Table

Antique Gothic Lamp

Antique Mild Parlor Settee

Vintage White Flowered Lamp

Antique Mild Dining Table

Antique Mild Fainting Couch

Roaring 20s Blue New Years Doll

Roaring 20s Green New Years Doll

Roaring 20s Plum New Years Doll

Antique Mild Chaise Lounge

Antique Mild Arm Chair

Roaring 20s Silver New Years Doll

Old Fashioned

Roaring 20s Gold New Years Doll

Antique Mild Side Chair

Antique Mild Cameo Settee

Really Awesome Cool Fun Person Sticker

I Want You Candy Heart

Im Your Number One Fan Sticker

Antique Mild Daybed

Black Drum Kit

Grand Piano


Stylin Oldskool Guitar

Microphone of The Voice

Blob Love Sticker

Blob Is Love Blob Is Life Sticker

Chess Board

Blobbin Is My Specialty Sticker

Blobular Sticker

Nine of Diamonds Playing Card

Steamwork Radio

Ringleader Black and Gold Overcoat

Emo Bubble Laugh

Nine of Clubs Playing Card

Nine of Hearts Playing Card

Tail Sprouting Top Hat

Arid Magic Wand

Comedic Muse

Nine of Spades Playing Card

Big Book of Jokes

Hand of Seven Cards

Crazy Eights Deck

Mismatched Playing Card Deck

The Best Knock-Knock Jokes

Dad Jokes

Whoopee Cushion

Lemon Throwing Pie

Kick Me Sticky


Jinxed Jack in the Box

Jubilant Jack in the Box

Jovial Jack in the Box

Jazzy Jack in the Box

Jaunty Jack in the Box

Trick Ice Cube

Spooky Little Book of Pranks

Spooky Little Book of Jokes

Spooky Little Book of Riddles

Party Games

Ace of Spades Sticker

Ace of Diamonds Sticker

Wild Ace Card

Ace of Clubs Sticker

Ace of Hearts Sticker

Wooden Playing Cards Case

Joker Card Eraser

Ace of Hearts Eraser

Ace of Spades Eraser

Gilded Playing Card Deck

Delish Decked Out Playing Cards

76 Card Games

Card Game Rules Pamphlet

Guide to Bluffing

Forgotten Book of Card Games

Poker Chip Erasers

Silver Flipper Coin

White Dice Shaker

Die Eraser

Fathers Day Poker Chips

The Feli Field Guide to Popularity

Dice Plushie

Lucky Die

Explosive Dark Matter Die

I Wanna Play A Game Sticker

Random Dice

Dark Matter Dice

Love Dice

Snake Eyes

Death Dice

Strange Dice Beanbag

Carnival Dice Sticker

Bluffing Dice

Set of Loaded Dice

Rigged 7s Dice

Random Fluffy Dice

White Dangle Dice

Slots Coin

Ivory Lucky Slot Plushie

Nightmare Billiard Ball

The Perfect Game Sticker

Memory from a Happy Summer

Antique Instantograph Camera

Antique Bellows Camera

Battered Antique Camera

Antique Box Camera

Antique Cameo Camera

Peacherine Ragtime Sheet Music

Maple Leaf Ragtime Sheet Music

The Rosebud March Sheet Music

Sunflower Slow Drag Sheet Music

The Entertainer Ragtime Sheet Music

Book Of World Records

Broken Record Player

Riftcore Vinyl

Classic Phonograph

Vintage Telephone

Black and White Film

Forgotten Relic

Dramatic Film Noir Poster

Rusted Pumpkin Morostide King Film

Vintage Film Camera

Vintage Typewriter

Carved Antique Pipe

Fountain Pen

Otherworldly Silver Compact

High Quality Disguise Projector

Targeting Reticule LED Mask

Rainbow Love LED Mask

Malfunctioning LED Mask

Coy Kitty LED Mask


Broken Chess Board

Mad World

Sad Smiley Sticker

Sad Face Eraser

Large Sad Face Ring

Zero Days Without Incident Sticker

Mesaa Planet Plushie

Lapidarian Planet Plushie

Dibbala Planet Plushie

Knotta Planet Plushie

Azure Planet Plushie

Box of Untold Secrets

Danger Zone Sticker


Dark Confessions

Dark Thing in a Box

Endurance Leeches

Speed Leech

Leech Protected Jewel

Strength Leech

Defense Leech

Bottled Hatred

Pop-Up Book of Frightening Things

Love Me or Die Beanbag

The Book of *diesoffright*


A Postcard from Insanity

Maniacal Gelatin Goop

Darker Matter

Over Exposed Photo

Amoeba of Dooom

Mystery Blob


Monstrous Tales

Nightmare Blob Beanbag

Masquerade Blob Mask

Nightmare Blob Plushie

Bloodred Rubber Monster Mask

Spiral Eyes Ink Blotch

Squiddly Ink Blotch

Yawning Void

Vintage Experiment 5162 Plushie


Double Eyes Ink Blotch

Spider Ink Blotch

Sucking Black Hole

Toothy Ink Blotch

Creeping Galaxy Plushie

Black Hole Sticker

Shroud of the Galaxy

Partys Over Sticker

Pet Friends