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The following is the transcript of a Subeta News Network special report from the front lines of the war against squirrels:



Database server 2 sustained heavy damage today when squirrels overran a disk array controller, forcing technicians to update its firmware.



Fortunately, no civilian data was harmed, as database server 2 was operating solely in backup capacity at the time.



However, the recent squirrel attack will result in a 15-minute downtime window tonight beginning at 1 AM Subeta time, in order to repair the broken link between the database servers.



Programmer alx announced the downtime earlier today, as well as hinted that new tactics are being deployed to hopefully win the war against Subeta's squirrel population once and for all.



That's all we have at this time. Thank you for listening to Subeta News Network!
User Avatar: 3

Posted by alx

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Mark my words, I will get that squirrel.
I love the way you put this message across. Best news post about down time ever. They should all be like this <img src="http://images.subeta.net/smilies/6398_emoticon_grin.gif" border="0" />
Silly squirrels...cute thou O.o
guess them darn squirrls got after subeta tonight . gonna have to get them darn squirls lol
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wait what im very cunfused like a lot
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Yesterday my dog killed a real life squirrel.
So, I think I've attributed to the cause. haha.
Awesome way to let us know what is happening to our home away from home. I am tuned into Subeta News Network awaiting further updates.
No squirrels in Australia, though our possums would possibly very close. Just a whole lot bigger!! They get into everything, break, destroy and get up to their fair share of mischief. Lets hope the squirrels don't know about these guys!!
Can't we bribe the squirrels with enough nuts to sick 'em on another site? <img src="http://images.subeta.net/smilies/6398_emoticon_grin.gif" border="0" /> And I've always laughed at my husband when he said they're out to get us... He quotes the Geico commercial for proof, where the squirrels plot to cause that guy to wreck... Maybe ya'll could get some cats to chase them away? <img src="http://images.subeta.net/smilies/6398_emoticon_grin.gif" border="0" />
Oh actually, just to announce;
Walker's have released Cajun Squirrel flavoured crisps.
Hm.
I think we will win this fight.
LOL. I read this with like the news suspenseful music you get in the background.
XDDD <3333
ahhh squirrels!! get the bazooka!!
takes out bazooka
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and they seemed so inocent sob
roflmao!!
OHMYGODWe'reallgonnaDIE! runs around in circles screaming, smacks into a wall, and falls over, mumbling about pretty birdies
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Can we not just offer the squirrels our birdfeed?
Aren't squirrels edible?
...
I love how things like this get shared on this site and turned into a funny tale for all of us to read. Thanks for keeping everyone informed and as much as I hate the site going down... those sqls are so cute <img src="http://images.subeta.net/smilies/6398_emoticon_raspberry.gif" border="0" /> Only on subeta would a site issue be turned into such a cute item.
Hey! I was just thinking... let's have a restock war, Subeta Team against the squirrels. XD
XD Silly programmer.
.....and I agree with Morticia gg
Yes - this evil squirrels are getting worse last time <img src="http://images.subeta.net/smilies/6398_emoticon_smile.gif" border="0" />
I love the SQLs though! shifty eyes
Time to hire a squirrelscatcher <img src="http://images.subeta.net/smilies/6398_emoticon_smile.gif" border="0" />
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YOU DAMN SQRL!
This was so much more fun to read lol
aaarrrrgggg.... now there are more errors than before. Stupid squirrels.
Looks like I picked a bad time to do my item hunts. ^^;;
Them squirrels are nuts!
I have to admit. This is one new broadcast that I was totally glued to and laughed and cried at the same time. Awesome reporting.
Neva! We shall rule the world <img src="http://images.subeta.net/smilies/6398_emoticon_wink.gif" border="0" />
Neva! We shall rule the world >:3
LMAO!! Thanks For The Laugh This Was Such Funny News!!!! I Mean I Am Sorry The Servers Are Going Down But What A Great Story!! Made Me Laugh Anyway.. Thanks I Needed It!! Good Luck On Fixing Things..
lol maybe we should set up a squirrel colony far away from the servers to transport them to then you should have less and less squirrel attacks <img src="http://images.subeta.net/smilies/6398_emoticon_raspberry.gif" border="0" /> lol
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-salutes- Good Luck!
Oof, darn those squirrels!
Well, I guess I can shower since Subeta has been consuming my life since I found it a whole three days ago... I suppose I should thank the squirrels for helping me get my life together again.
Best news ever!
Are you sure you didn't leave a can of nuts near the servers!? <img src="http://images.subeta.net/smilies/6398_emoticon_raspberry.gif" border="0" /> Crazy squirrels...
Man, I'm seriously starting to hate squirrels with a passion now thanks to Subeta.
Stupid Squirrels!

Awesome way of letting us know :3
Sql? Ugly? That's NUTS!
silly squirrels, servers are for programmers.
i love squirrels ._.
Oops, that didn't work very well.
I just wanted the images. Gaw!
omg i love how you guys informed us! Very cool. Now to War! xD It's squirrel hunting time!!
Very clever alx. The writer in my is highly amused. Good luck!
~Znogirl out!
God squirrels scare me.
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looks at Garenth
You.. are bad.*LOL*
thanks for the warning prepares for war
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How many times do I need to tell you.
Don't touch their nuts.

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