Information

Shichimen has a minion!

Sloopy the Frayglite

Shichimen
Legacy Name: Shichimen

The

Common Paralix
Owner:

OtakuOokami

Age: 17 years, 3 months, 3 weeks

Born: December 26th, 2006

Adopted: 17 years, 3 months, 3 weeks ago (Legacy)

Adopted: December 26th, 2006 (Legacy)

Nominate Pet for Spotlight

Statistics

Level: 15
Strength: 37
Defense: 35
Speed: 31
Health: 31
HP: 31/31
Intelligence: 49
Books Read: 44
Food Eaten: 0
Job: Professional Shusher

Personal Stats:
Class: Bard
Personality: Jolly, friendly, Easy going
Strength: Quite smart, Knows much lore and a few magic songs
Weakness: Easily distracted at times, has a tenancy to ramble
Theme Song: "Seven Seas of Rye" by Queen
Video: How Org. XIII say Grace
Art: OtakuOokami's sexy drawing of me, Asmoday's "Floating in Paradise" (this guy must be psychic :D), Another drawing by OtakuOokami

Nice to meet you, I'm Chi, the hard partying rock-and-roll bard. No need to rush off, now. Sit back, grab a seat, have a beer and let me tell you the tale of how my adventures in the great, wide world began. What? You don't think that's a good idea?! Buddy, a professional bard is offering you a free story and free booze! How often does that happen? Huh? I don't seem much like a bard? All bards are dull and formal unless we're practicing our trade, you say? O.K., O.K., I'll give you that, but I'm not the traditional type. I do what I want, how I want...which never really went over well with most of my family.

You see, my full name is Hiryu Shichimen. Yeah, from that Hiryu family. The prestigious bardic clan with a history and pedigree stretching nearly as far back as recorded history. My ancestors have been practitioners of bardic craft and magic for millennia, and I was brought up from birth to follow in this great tradition. From the time I could grip an instrument I was taught to play the flute, lute, lyre, harp, guitar, pan pipes, violin... You name it, I've probably played it at least once. From the time I uttered my first word I was taught to sing and recognize notes by ear. I learned to read and write music along with the written word, expected to memorize ancient poetry in dead languages like any other child was expected to memorize her times tables. While other kids played pee-wee soccer and little league baseball, I was learning elegant and exotic dances that had been passed down through the ages to countless generations of bards, each detailing a different fable or legend.

All that stuff wasn't too bad, though. I mean, while other kids were flunking history, I could recite it frontwards and back and sing it too. While other kids struggled to start learning their first instrument at the age of nine or ten, I had already mastered four. It was the other part of being a bard that was the burr in my arse...the adherence to tradition and protocol that weighed on me like a leaden weight 'round a butterfly's legs.

I had to learn to carry myself as a "respectable bard." That meant wearing a silk kimono (which I was absolutely not allowed to get dirty), putting my hair up (gods forbid I ever let it just flow free), and following a laundry list of outdated rules and traditions. I couldn't go out and party. A "respectable bard" reserves her enthusiasm for the stage. I wasn't allowed to speak too loudly. A "respectable bard" raises her voice only to sing and to recite poetry and tales. It was really enough to drive a girl mad!

Granted, Paralixes in general hold traditions in high esteem. You'd be hard pressed to find one of my kind who is unwilling to dress up for Morostide or decorate their Lumineve tree. However, most have put aside things like wearing pearl jewelry to ward off evil spirits and arranging their kids' marriages. That's right, I wasn't allowed to pick my own husband, my parents had already done it for me.

That's right. On my seventeenth birthday, my parents threw a party for me. A traditional Paralix birthday party out in the courtyard, with music and food (Lots of food! Paralixes love to eat!) and fireworks. They invited my entire extended family. Aunts, uncles, cousins, grand parents, great grands, great great grands...for, as you know, Paralixes can live to be nearly two hundred. They also invited all of their friends, including their dear friends Yukiryu Nami and Yukiryu Hideki along with (much to my dismay) their son Sasuke.

Now, I hated (and still hate) Yukiryu Sasuke with a fierce passion. Ever since we were kids, he's always done nothing but try and boss me around and keep me from having any fun! I go to catch frogs in the stream behind my house and he goes, "Shichimen! That's not proper behavior for a bard! We should hurry back before you get your kimono all wet and dirty!" I decide I want to get wild and dance on the table at the waffle house because my song just came on the radio and he pulls me down and goes, "Shichimen! How can you embarrass your family with this kind of behavior? That's no way for a young lady to act!" Any time I tried to have any fun and he was with me, forget it! The guy is obnoxiously stiff, disgustingly proper, and the very sound of his voice makes me want to punt a puppy...and I love puppies!!

After avoiding the toad all night, I thought I was in the clear...until my parents got up on stage, that is. My mother tapped on a champagne glass to get everyone's attention as she and my father stood there in front of everyone, smiling more happily than I'd ever seen them. "May we have everyone's attention!" Mother called as the crowd settled down, "Kenji and I have some wonderful news to share with everyone!"

"That's right!" my father said, beaming with joy, "As you all know, today is our dear Shichimen's seventeenth birthday. She has grown into a beautiful and talented...if more than a little hyperactive...young woman and soon she will be old enough to wed. In preparation for that glorious day, Sakura and I have chosen for her a fine husband."

'Husband?!' I thought, more annoyed than anxious, 'What are they thinking?! I'm not ready to get hitched yet!!'

"And that lucky young man is," Mother continued, cheerful as a spring morning, "Yukiryu Sasuke! The two have known each other since childhood and in a year's time shall walk the path into adulthood as one!"

Mother and Father kept talking, but I barely heard a word after that. It was like I was caught in a soundless vacuum as a cold, sick feeling overtook my stomach. It was all I could do to just keep my supper down! Then, when I could finally find my voice again, the first thing I did was scream, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" up into the starry heavens, so loud that they probably heard me up on Atebus. Not a second after that, I went running into the house, screaming like I was being chased by a chainsaw wielding maniac. Needless to say, this was not a happy birthday.

I locked my bedroom door and eventually fell asleep. In the morning, I rolled out of bed, still dressed from the night before...although considerably more disheveled...and wandered down the hall to my parents' bedroom. I had to convince them to call the whole thing off...I just had to! I'd be miserable married to Sasuke! When I came through the door, however, they didn't let me get a word in edgewise as they laid into me for how "rude" I'd been the night before and how "lucky" I was to be betrothed to a guy from such a fine family as Sasuke! Hell, they even wanted me to formally apologize for screaming and running off like that! After all, it was "offensive" and "disrespectful" to my "future in-laws."

Well, friend, that was the straw that broke the camel's back. I walked out of that room, boiling mad. So mad that I had to drink a glass of water to keep myself from breathing fire all over the place. Mother and Father insisted on following tradition and forcing me to marry a guy I couldn't stand and going to them to reverse the betrothal was totally out. Just when I was about to head-desk on the kitchen table, however, I got a brilliant idea. If they insisted on using tradition to ruin my life, maybe I could use tradition to stop them!

Among Paralixes, there's a strict family hierarchy. In short, the older you are, the more say you have in things. If a child's parents decide something for him or her that the child dislikes, they can always appeal to grandparents and great grandparents, all the way up to the oldest member of the clan if need be, to try and get that decision revoked! Yes, it had to work, otherwise I'd be stuck in a loveless marriage with a guy I wanted to strangle with an extension chord!

First, I went to my grandmother and grandfather. I came to them while they were out in the garden taking a stroll, got down on my knees before them, and bowed down to them, saying, "Honored Grandparents, please hear my request. I implore you to make my parents revoke my betrothal to Yukiryu Sasuke! I don't want to marry him...or anyone for that matter! I want to see the world and enjoy my life and marry someone I actually love!"

Grandfather harumphed. "Ah, so now the defiant child decides to turn to tradition and seek for her elders to override her parents?" he said, "So, you only respect tradition when it suits your needs? Such a selfish girl!"

"Yes, look at you, kneeling at our feet, seeking our favor," Grandmother said with a tisk, "Especially after the stunt you pulled last night! I agree with the match. Maybe being married to Sasuke will be the thing to finally curb your wild behavior!"

"But--" I pleaded, but Grandfather interrupted me.

"Enough, Shichimen," he said in a stern, disapproving tone, "Now, leave us be and let us continue our walk."

I got up from the cobblestone path as they walked right by me. As I watched them go, it was pretty obvious I'd have to go the next step up. It was time to visit Great Grandfather Gin. The old man was once a globe-trotting bard with a reputation for having an amazing stage presence and being a lousy tipper. Now that he's well into his hundred and twenties, he spends most of his time up in his room, watching reruns of old T.V. shows and yelling at the news. You know, typical old people stuff.

I knocked on the door of his room, and he bid me enter. He raised one thick, bushy, grey eyebrow at me as I entered and stroked his long mustache as he watched me bow down before him. "Honored Great Grandfather, please hear my request," I said in the most respectful tone I could muster, "I implore you, in your infinite wisdom, to have my parents revoke my betrotha--" I didn't even get to finish my sentence before the old coot started laughing at me like an old master in a badly dubbed kung-fu movie.

"Little girl! How ungrateful are you?!" Great Grandfather scoffed, "Your parents have chosen you a fine husband from a prestigious bardic clan, and all you can do is come to me, begging to undo all of their hard work! You make our ancestors weep in Heaven and turn in their graves! Just look at you! You have a chance to actually do something right and here you are trying to get out of it! Shame on you, Shichimen!! Now leave me! It's almost time for MacSkyver!!"

Disappointed, and just a tad angry, I left Great Grandfather Gin alone with the boob tube. I had just one elder left to appeal to. My trump card, my ace in the hole... Great Great Grandmother Sayuri. Of everyone in my family, she had always been the most accepting of my personality. Hell, sometimes she was even my partner in crime! She's well over one hundred and fifty, but she has so much energy and life in her that you wouldn't think her to be a day over sixty. Whenever I needed help, she was always there for me...even when it was help sneaking into the house past my curfew or getting gum out of my fur after trying to blow a bubble big enough to bounce around in. Hopefully, she'd be able to help me this time too.

I found her in her bedroom, sitting there, playing the harp. Her technique was flawless as she played that beautiful melody. Her eyes were closed as if she were in deep meditation. When I walked through the door, a small smile crossed her face. "Hello, Chi," she said, not stopping her nimble fingers or opening her eyes to look up at me, "I knew you'd come to see me eventually. Let me guess, it's about your betrothal?"

I sighed and nodded, "Yes, Great Great Grandmother. I came to ask you if you'd overturn the whole thing."

Great Great Grandmother Sayuri took her time and finished her song, then looked right up at me. "Absolutely! That Sasuke isn't a good match for you at all!" she said, "I wanted to tell your parents a thing or two myself last night, but I decided to wait for you to come to me first."

"You... You did?!" I asked in disbelief.

"Well, I didn't want to run into the old 'but she's not protesting it herself' excuse," she said, "I had to make sure that you were willing to fight for your freedom before sticking my nose into your business! You're not the kind of girl who needs to get married off to some punk with a stick up his ass and no sense of humor, Chi. I know that what you really want is to see the world and have your adventures. After all, you're just like me when I was young!"

"Really?" I asked, "So, that's why you were always so cool with me?"

The old woman nodded. "Yes. Why, my parents even tried to marry me off to some stiff-necked prick too!" she said, "Unfortunately, none of my elders was willing to side with me, so I just ran away from home. Luckily, you won't have to."

In moments, Great Great Grandmother Sayuri and I were heading to talk to my parents. We found them sitting in the family room, enjoying a nice game of Go... Well, nice until Great Great Grandmother stood right on top of the board, kicked the stones onto the floor, and started giving my parents the tongue-lashing of a lifetime!

"So! You have time to be playing games, but you don't have time to consider your daughter's feelings?!" she boomed, "How callous can two people be?!"

"G-great Grandmother!" Father stammered in total shock, "W-w-what's this all about?"

"What's this all about, Kenji?! What's this aaaallll about!" Great Great Grandmother Sayuri said forcefully, looking down her nose at my father with her head held high like the Queen of Sheba, "I think you and Sakura both know exactly what this is about!"

"Please, Lady Sayuri, calm down!" Mother begged, scooting away in terror, "We are only thinking of Shichimen's best interest!"

"Oooooh, no you're not!" Great Great Grandmother exclaimed, jumping down spryly from the Go board and turning her attention to my mother now, "If you were, you would have taken what happened last night as a sign that you were on the wrong track, not berated poor Chi for 'being rude' just because she was horrified out of her mind!! You two," she continued, looking back and forth between my parents with golden eyes that burned like a thousand suns, "were only thinking of yourselves and this family's reputation. Nothing more."

"But, Sasuke is a fine young man and his parents are good friends of ours," Father said, getting back some of his composure, but still shaking in his boots.

"And he's also a sniveling little wet blanket!" Great Great Grandmother said, "Instead of having fun with Chi, letting her flames of passion melt his icy propriety, he stubbornly tries to douse those flames every time. You may get along fine with his parents, but those two are a terrible match! They're bound to make each other miserable...and I will not allow any great great grandchild of mine to be miserable!"

"Then, what would you have us do?" Mother asked, "Is there another, more suitable young man you have in mind?"

"Heeeellll no!" Great Great Grandmother said, "I'm not about to pick Chi's husband for her! That's something she should be doing for herself!! She should be allowed to go off, see the world, meet her soulmate... That's what I did, and I am better and wiser for it! If you two want Chi to do this family proud and become a better, more mature person, then you must stop treating her like a child! You said yourselves that she's a young woman now...so let her choose her own damn path!!"

"But... what if she marries some uncultured roughneck?" Father asked, "What if she brings home a--"

"That's her choice, and I advise you to shut your pie hole and accept it!" Great Great Grandmother said, "I went out into the world at her age, had my adventures, and met and fell in love with your Great Grandfather along the way. Were he here today, Hiroyuki, gods rest him, would smack the taste from your mouth to hear you saying such things!! In fact, he would be here were it not for that bungee jumping accident in '79..."

"So...we should simply revoke the betrothal and set our daughter loose upon the world?" Mother asked, "Are you sure that's what's best?"

"I'd be lying if I said I've never been wrong," Great Great Grandmother said, much calmer now, "but I rarely ever am. You can't cage a phoenix like a canary and expect it to play the part happily. Either you set it free, or it melts the bars of its cage and liberates itself."

Mother and Father looked over at me, then up at Great Great Grandmother Sayuri, and nodded. They finally understood that no matter how hard they tried to push tradition on me, there were just some things they would never be able to make me do. Later that day, they called up the Yukiryus and broke the news. The engagement was off.

And so, the next week, I packed up my things and left home for the open road. My parents worried that I might get myself into huge trouble one day...and they were actually right. Four years later, I did end up in a jam that I couldn't get out of alone. That, though, is another story entirely...and if you want it for free, you'll have to ask my good friend Ookami.