Information


Blue Rocker has a minion!

Hetfield the Rockitty




Blue Rocker
Legacy Name: Blue Rocker


The Custom Common Experiment #104
Owner: Chrysariel

Age: 4 years, 8 months, 4 weeks

Born: December 21st, 2015

Adopted: 4 years, 4 months, 2 weeks ago

Adopted: May 3rd, 2016

Statistics


  • Level: 98
     
  • Strength: 188
     
  • Defense: 10
     
  • Speed: 10
     
  • Health: 10
     
  • HP: 10/10
     
  • Intelligence: 689
     
  • Books Read: 682
  • Food Eaten: 0
  • Job: Couture Designer


Blue Rocker

"Why are you standing in the door like that? Come on in, grab a seat and don't mind Hetfield's fur. Or mine." He grinned. "One of those little lint rollers will clean that right off."

He's not exactly what you expected when you envisioned the rock icon from Slither & Crawl but your celebrity interview essay is due Monday morning and Mr. Rocker was gracious enough to grant you an hour of his time. This is hardly the time to start worrying about etiquette...or the threat to your school uniform.

"So, you want to know about the life of a rockstar, huh?"

He takes a deep drink from a glass of amber liquid. You'd be willing to guess it's from the Libertine Lounge, a place your parents often speak about toward the end of winter but one you are forbidden to enter for another five years. You have to settle for lemonade but at least it's iced.

"It's not all parties and glamour, kid. You should know that right up front. There will be nights you wake up in a gutter somewhere, guest to a wary family of terracoons scrounging in the trash cans. You will spend twice what you make in royalties and end up living on noodle bowls for the next month. You will have your little heart broken on a daily basis when some pretty girl blows you a kiss from the audience." He shifts position, shuffling a few pillows to support his back.

"Still, there are plenty of perks to the rockin' life. You see those guitars standing against the east wall? Go on, go over and take a look. They're all labelled with who gave them to me, the year, and what tour Slither & Crawl was playing at the time."

You accept his invitation. The guitars range in size, shape, and color. Here is one gifted from Lainara Layne, that bubble-gum pop dawn lain whose sticky sweet tunes are always playing at Candy Shack. Here's one from Terroria, the leading lady of Prehistoric Rhythm. Your breath catches at the center display. The cherry-red guitar was signed by Bumbadon Crawl, co-founder of Slither & Crawl. You can't resist asking about that one!

"Ah, yes. Bumba had an eye for good instruments and pretty girls. I owe him a lot."

*****

"I didn't start life on Golden Potion Avenue. I was the son of an auto mechanic and a waitress and the most I had to look forward to was inheriting the garage. I had no interest in cars other than to drive them, but a boy without two subeta points to rub together doesn't go filling his head with fancy thoughts, or so my old man always used to tell me." He sighs softly.

"Symon Serpenth and Bumbadon Crawl both grew up in that same town. They paired up to win the talent show every year and everybody in town was convinced that with their connections, they would grow up to be Subetans of great consequence. They were sort of right, though the thought of Sym or Bumba in a business suit cracks me up! They were walking past the garage one day when I was working on an engine. I'd always had this nervous habit of drumming my wrench on anything that wouldn't shatter, including the metal components over the hood. Used to drive my old man nuts. I must have given him more headaches than those good-for-nothing buttwings that liked to invade the house every spring. Bumba sort of paused to listen. The tune was something the pair had played last year to heavy applause. His pause made Symon pause and before I know it, they're asking me to sit in on one of their jam sessions."

"I knew what my dad would say to me giving up an afternoon of work to make noise on the back of a garbage can lid so I told him I had to stay at school late for a project. He couldn't read past the third grade level but he took great pride in my schooling."

"Symon's garage was awesome. There must have been six different pinball machines, all of them the latest games. I think he kind of enjoyed seeing me have a good time and I know Bumba did. Mostly because he beat me at every multi-player game except Ski Slopes. I took to that game like a torrent takes to water. Only Symon had a real guitar then. Bumba's keyboard was a toy with sound effects and I had to settle for the family garbage cans for drums. We made a noise that must have scared every alley feli for twelve city blocks but rough as we were, we did have a certain rhythm." He grinned.

"Our chance to play at Crooked Note came a few years later. We rocked the joint and earned a place in the Battle of the Bands. I'm talking THE Battle of the Bands, not that publicity show opened to the public a few years back. We not only took first place and landed a contract with Big Bumbus Records - we were also the first band to have an uncut original aired on the radio."

"It was Bumba that introduced me to Elena. She was a cream telenine with gorgeous fur and the most intense blue eyes I'd ever seen. But the only good thing that came out of that marriage were Peep and Nuzzle. My boys were cute right out of the litter. When they were old enough to walk, they were backstage every time we finished a set to give me a hug. It took me years to realize how different Elena and I were. She was so nervous. She'd let her sister take care of the kids all the time and I only ever got her to attend one concert. She liked my music well enough on the radio but she just couldn't take the noise of live concerts as she got older. I can't say we hated each other when we parted, but we were far from in love by then. We saw each other on the holidays every year until Nuzzle turned 18. I think she's living somewhere in Peka Glade now and that she's married to some bird watcher. Good for her."

"We had a total of eleven tours during our glory days, one for each of Subeta's major lands including Atebus. We were planning to do it all over again until we lost Bumba." He sighs and is lost in thought for a moment.

*****

His call for his minion Hetfield is quite unexpected, taking you out of the story with a few dazed blinks. The Rockitty trots across the room to fill Blue's request for salmon.

"Bring enough for two, Het! We wouldn't want our guest to think us rude."You decide it may be best not to mention that you've already eaten. Blue's pleasure at thinking of such a hospitality shows on his face.

"I've got a real love of seafood. Give it to me raw or cooked, I'll eat anything that's fished from fresh or salt water. Now bugs, on the other hand, bugs are disgusting. Snake meat is even worse. Fortunately, my friendship with Symon gives me an out on that one, but Bumba convinced me to try a chocolate-covered cricket once. Yuck! I never will understand what he saw in those things."

He waits for you to take a few crackers before eagerly devouring the rest of the salmon paste in the little blue jar. His ability to work his way through stacks of crackers is rather fascinating to watch. For such an average-sized Experiment 104, he certainly does eat well.

"Speaking of Bumba, he made quite a joke out of the end of my first marriage, but his death right after was a real blow. It was grief over his accident and the split of Slither & Crawl that had me marrying in a cheap little place near the Carnival Stand. The flowers were all fake and I'm pretty sure the guy reading the lines was drunk, but it was official. Gloriette was the most lively tigrean you could ever hope to meet in a dance club. We hated each other after about two days. It only took us a week to separate and sign the papers." He shook his head.

"I know Symon was worried about me. He had a family he could rely on, even if he couldn't spend a lot of time with them. He started bullying me to take dinner at his place. One night his wife's cousin Chris just happened to be in town. It was love at first sight. Don't look at me like that, it really was! She looked at me and I felt like someone had punched me in the chest. I couldn't stop looking at her, even though I felt kind of bad for making her blush so much. She was so easy to talk to and she laughed when she found me funny, not to please me. I don't love my first two sons less, but the three kids I have with Chris...I know they'll do great things. Jessie has her heart set on working for Atebus Corp, Cayla will be starting law school in a year and Joey's a math genius. They must get all their brains from their mother!" He laughs and grins.

"Where has Chris gotten to, anyways? I'd sure love for you to meet her. She's a lot easier on the eyes, I swear." Hetfield does a little dance that has Blue nodding. "Oh yes, that's right. She had that March for Minions walk today. Sorry. The old mind machine isn't what it used to be. She was the one that convinced me to go the way of Symon, you know. I never thought I'd get up on stage again but my kids were all so happy to see Dad rocking out with their favorite band, Zip It! Zip's got some serious talent and he's a good kid, but he's got a way to go if he ever wants to be the icon his dad is."

The glass of lemonade given at the start of your visit is empty, save for a few half-melted ice cubes. Blue notices, calling for Hetfield.

"Where are your manners, Het? We can't let a guest go thirsty." Het is back in a moment, grinning up at you as he pours you a fresh glass. How he can keep his own little guitar in hand no matter what he does is a mystery for another day as Blue is speaking again.

"I don't know that I'll be able to do another concert. Symon still has that youthful vitality for all his complaints about aches in his coils. I'm getting to the point where all I care to do is look out the window at that lazy river and have me a good nap in the sun. I'll tell you the best piece of advice anyone can give, kid. Slow down and smell the roses at the side of the road. Don't just let them pass in a blur of color. Life moves too fast and before you know it, you need your minion's help just to get out of your chair." His laughter at his own misfortune is genuine and his invitation for you to come back and visit any time is without a doubt sincere. This is an afternoon you will never forget.

Credits


Profile Code by: Ringo
Extra Code by: Sunrise
Edited by: Chrysariel
Overlay by: Subeta
Recolored Overlay by:
Morse & Chrysariel
Story by: Pureflower
Background by:
Metallica Free desktopimages.org
Band Silouette by:
Harmonix Music Systems
Slither and Crawl Font:
Another Danger by The Branded Quotes
Rocker by: Giphy.com
Name Art by: Chrysariel

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CD of Ultimate Terror

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